I'm laughing at myself...

Schadenfreude

2008-02-13T23:13:00.000-08:00

schadenfreude \SHOD-n-froy-duh\, noun: A malicious satisfaction obtained from the misfortunes of others.

When I was younger I suffered a lot from the sad effects of schadenfreude. I used to use this word a lot with my friend as we secretly celebrated when those who we didn't think deserved what they had came to experience the sadness and depravity that we, the more deserving of happiness, somehow seemed to happen upon on a consistent basis.

That all changed when I really did become happy.

Lately I've been feeling a certain vibe of ill will from someone in my life. I've never quite been able to pin point where that ill will came from, but I've recently come to the conclusion that this person may actually be jealous of me. Jealous of me, say whaaa?! Seriously peeps, how could anyone feel jealous of someone who walks around every day with her insecurities on her sleeve for all to take advantage of and tromp upon? But then again, maybe that's just it. Despite all of my insecurities and shortcomings, I've come to accept and even like who I am. Sure I still care about what other people think, but more because I care about them as people and not because I want them to shape who I am in order to be more likeable in their eyes. I choose not to buy into (excuse my French) petty bullshit like whether or not I said the right thing to the right person in order to look good or gain favor for my own benefit.

Some might say it's lame of me to blog about this, that I should just confront the person directly. The problem with this is that I've come to gain a reputation as someone with a paranoid personality who is overly sensitive, so it is easy for people to chalk up such thoughts to my own inner demons. The other thing is, if I really cared to repair my relationship with this person I might try to talk to them about it, but I prefer to analyze and reflect on the situation (i.e. I frankly don't care much for the most part since I am not willing to subject myself to the emotional abuse). And finally, if I feel someone will be open and accepting and honest when discussing such matters with me I might say something, but again, I think that some people are more concerned about making themselves look like the good guy and I am just not down to having a one-sided honest, put-your-feelings-out-there conversation with someone who I feel might be unreciprocal and manipulative. Besides, how do you confront someone about such an insane theory anyway?

"Dear so-and-so, I know you are jealous of me, so step off!"

Somehow that just doesn't quite cut it.

Come to think of it, maybe it isn't so much jealousy with this person as it is a feeling that I am undeserving of the things I have in life. Bet ya they'd feel schadenfreude towards me in a heartbeat!

And if you're wondering if I'm talking about you, don't worry, the person who I am referring to would never ever read my blog because they don't believe in blogs or something totally contrary to who I am.

Another rant from Crazy Conspiracy Theory Lady. There, I feel better now.

Dreams Do Come True

2008-01-26T16:05:00.000-08:00

Hey there.

Thought I'd pop in to share with you the exciting news I just found out. The New Kids on the Block are reuniting!

Which reminds me of a story I have about my brush with my favorite New Kid, Joey Joe, but I'll save that one for another day.

In the meantime, I forgot that I need to follow up with my previous Celebrity Chronicle. The movie premiere that I attended was waaay back in 1992, "Boomerang" starring Eddie Murphy and Halle Berry.

This was way back before Halle was the mega superstar she is today. My friend Joy and I had driven up to L.A. on a random day and saw that a huge crowd had formed outside of Mann's Chinese Theater in anticipation of the Boomerang premiere. Being the outgoing guy magnet type she managed to finagle two tickets from an intern from Power 106 who was stationed in a van in front of the theater. Walking down a red carpet is pretty fun and exciting for a pop-culture obsessed 17-year old girl as I imagined that the photographers were taking pictures of me instead of Holly Robinson and Karen from "Fresh Prince of Bel Air". The celebrities we saw ranged from Grace Jones and Dikembe Mutumbo to Brian Robbins (remember "Head of the Class"?) and Shawn Wayans. We actually got to talk to Marlon Wayans, Heavy D, and Denzel Washington (nicest: Marlon Wayans, most annoyed with fans: Denzel Washington). Overall, a fun and memorable time for a little teenage nerd.

Speaking of Denzel, I just went on a whirlwind on-the-cheap trip to New York (flew into the tiny Islip airport and crashed on a futon at an apartment in East Brooklyn) where my travel companion, Suzanna, and I went to see taping of "Late Night with David Lettermen" where Denzel happened to be one of the guests. Here are a few highlights of the trip:

Me in Times Square (still had to show the West Coast pride by taking a picture with a ginormous Kobe Bryant)

Cool graffitti at 5 Points, a building where the owner legally allows people to express their artistic side al fresco. We got to visit a few amazing museums (PS1, the Noguchi Museum). The exhibit that I found to be most memorable was called "The Meeting" - it was just a room with a big square hole cut in the ceiling (is it still considered a hole even though it's square? well, whatever). There were seats in the room up against a wall with a slanted back so you could just sit there and stare out at the sky above you. It just gave me this calm, serene feeling and made me think about how so rarely do we have the chance to enjoy nature without any interruptions. As people entered the room, a noticeable hush permeated the space as we all sat in quiet contemplation at the awe-inspiring masterpiece that is Mother Nature. I didn't want to interrupt such a lovely feeling by snapping away on my camera so I didn't take any pictures, but I found this one on the PS1 website:

The picture, of course, doesn't do it justice, so I highly advise anybody who is planning a trip to NYC to go see it for themselves.

Phew, all this deep thinking and New York walking sure can work up a girl's appetite!

Luckily I found a small snack at the Hershey's Store in Time's Square to tide me over...

...that is until I found some yummy hot dogs at Gray's Papaya!

This was just one of the many stops I took on my informal "How I Met Your Mother" tour, which Suzanna kindly endured (Gray's Papaya was where they stopped on New Year's Eve for an almost midnight snack). I figured any hot dog that was worth risking missing out on a fun New Year's Eve party better be good and boy was it ever! This spot was also recommended by one of my fellow foodies and good friend Sarah, who was kind enough to send me info on all the places she used to frequent when she lived in New York (thanks Sarah!).

Stop #2 on Cheryl's "HIMYM" tour was McGee's, the bar that is the inspiration for the one in the show:

An added bonus was that we were able to catch Happy Hour while we were there - where else would you be able to get $5 martinis in the heart of Time's Square? As Barney would say, it was LEGEN...wait for it...DARY!

On a much more somber note, we were also able to stop by the 9/11 site and the firehouse located just across the street. As I looked at the pictures of all the firemen who lost their lives on that tragic day, all of the emotions I felt when I first saw the Twin Towers crashing down came rushing back to me. Just to see how level the ground is compared to the last time I visited New York and saw those enormous buildings towering before me really reminded me of how much that one day has altered where we are today. On our trip we met a lady who worked on Wall Street and at the time worked in the building right next to the Twin Towers. As she told the story of how she rushed out of the building, leaving behind her cell phone and wallet, walked across the Brooklyn Bridge in high heels, later discovering that the security guard who had helped everyone out of her building died when a piece of the Twin Towers destroyed the atrium in which he had stayed behind in, I could see the pain etched in her face and the words displayed on the wall outside of the firehouse came echoing back to me..."May We Never Forget".

Anticlimactic

2008-01-04T16:15:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year everyone! Since we're starting anew in '08 I suppose now is the time to post the pics of my "new" hairdo. I realized that I got the most votes for the hair cut of a person who I named that doesn't even exist. It's Rachel McAdams, not Amy Adams! Where did I get Amy Adams from anyway? Isn't that the 90's Christian pop music singer? If so, I would have gotten a nice curly big-hair perm.

I went somewhere between chickening out and making a change. I had my hair dyed, and love the color. The cut is okay, but still not too dramatic of a change from what it was before. Here it is right after I had it done. Keep in mind, I had just received the full sha-bang styling job:

Why is it that my hair never looks the same after the day I get it cut? Here is a picture from a week later on New Years when I styled it myself:

You can't see it very well in this picture, but to me it pretty much looks like it did before. All that build up and this is what you get - a semi-new/back to the old 'do. I hope I don't get any hate comments from those of you who cared enough to cast your vote.

In other voting news, I'm excited that Barack Obama won the Iowa caucus. He's been my pick from the get-go. I think this nation just needs someone who is really going to look out for the interests of the people instead of spending so much time investing in making decisions based on what's going to keep them in their position the longest. Go Barack!

Seriously, how can you see this and not absolutely love the guy?

Okay, getting off my political pedastal now. Time to get on my movie critic pedastal! Best movie I saw in 2007?

Kyle had been dying to see Juno for weeks and we finally had a chance to see it last week. I normally don't like to get movie recommendations because inevitably someone will come back and say they had such high expectations and it didn't live up to them, but I have to say I really enjoyed this movie overall. Well-written, well-acted, great soundtrack - so if you enjoy witty dialogue performed by solid actors with some fun tunes playing to enhance your movie-going experience, then I highly recommend Juno.

That being said, I'm really trying to downplay the whole movie here. All I can say is GO SEE IT! Then you can judge for yourself. But if you disagree with me then you're crazy. Hehe. The only thing I didn't like about it is that since it is a chick-flick, Kyle is trying to pass it off as being my movie choice so that he can pick the next one too. Nice try buddy!

Vote for a New Me

2007-12-20T16:07:00.000-08:00

So have you ever made a hair appointment thinking that you were going to emerge afterwards a brand new you, with fabulous hair and glowing skin to boot? Every time I go to get my hair cut I conjure up images of ecstatic women emerging from behind mystery doors (or curtains if you will) as their friends and family all ooh and ahh over their life-changing transformation. Apparently I've been watching too many Makeover Editions of Oprah, Ellen, Rachael Ray, and pretty much every other talk show imaginable (except for Tyra, we all know that Tyra's show is all about Tyra and the only person who ever gets made over is herself - not that she needs it or anything, after all she is TYRA damn it!). But, I digress...

Tomorrow I have a haircut appointment and I'm thinking of doing something drastic for the New Year. The problem is, I already know that I don't look so great with short hair, and every time I try cutting it short I just long for the day when my hair will be long enough for me to slap up into a ponytail. The other problem is that I can never find a good hair cut picture to base whatever new look I'm going after on. Today I went to Target and bought a few magazines that I could frantically flip through looking for my dream haircut. Lo and behold, In Style has come up with the brills idea of creating an online makeover studio! As Barney would say, "Whhaaatt Uupppp!". My makeover dreams have come true! Now I can see how a haircut will actually look on me instead of an insanely gorgeous model that would look good in a purple and green colored mullet. And you, my dear friends, can vote on which look you like best since we all know that I cannot make a decision to save my life. Actually, my main problem right now is that I think the style that looks best is the one that pretty much looks like how my hair is right now, and I fear that my judgment is clouded from being afraid of change and such.

And now thanks to the wonders of technology I present to you, ladies and gentlemen, the contenders for my new hairstyle:

Option 1: The Mary Kate (or is it Ashley?)

Option 2: Amy Adams (If I do this one I might have to make Kyle re-enact that rain scene from The Notebook with me)

Option 3: J Lo (no, the baby bump will not come with this one)

Option 4: Reese Witherspoon (the dreaded bangs, I know!)
Option 5: Gwyneth Paltrow
(but really it's just pretty much how my hair looks now)

So what do y'all think?

Pick a New Me!

Make your own poll

Finally

2007-10-24T09:56:00.000-07:00

I guess it took a natural disaster to finally get me to post.

I never thought I would say this, but I'm sick of watching TV. 24 hour round the clock news coverage of fires when you can't really do much about it is exhausting. I'm thankful I'm not being effected much by what is going on, though my parents still can't get back to the house. Of course, they haven't minded it much the past few days since it gave them just another excuse to go to Pechanga. Kyle conjured up an image of my dad driving through the smoke and haze bellowing "Pechanga here I come!" Somehow I don't think it was too far from the truth. Despite the 15 being closed off and traffic being diverted west due to the fires to the east of the house, my dad somehow found a way to make it to a casino Northeast of him. Where there's a will, there's a way...

Now that school has been canceled for the week I have time to blog, so maybe I'll try to make up for lost time. And for J and Chermano, who guessed Carlton Banks/Alfonso Ribero....ding ding ding! You are correct. He was one of my first celebrity sightings. I went to one of those cheesey teeny bopper concerts held by the local pop radio station, KIIS-FM, back in 1989 called the "Rat Pack" concert. Just outside of Universal Amphitheater, I ran into a pack of girls following
Tommy Puett (some dude from the TV show "Life Goes On") who was with Alfonso Ribero, and I actually got to touch his jacket! Maybe if you're nice to me I'll let you shake the same hand I touched it with.

Here's another celebrity chronicle item for you...what movie premiere did I attend where I got to meet two Wayans brothers, a (literally) big rapper, and a cop turned bad? Hint: my celebrity chronicles are going in chronological order.

15 Minutes of Fame

2007-08-28T22:18:00.001-07:00

Brother (actually Kyle's brother, but he is "Brother" to me too) recently e-mailed me a flyer that was distributed nationally by the company he works for. The flyer prominently displays a picture of him doing his thang on a boat:

This got me to thinking about everyone's 15 minutes of fame. Evidence of Kyle's 15 minutes of fame can be found on the website for Best Buddies, the non-profit that he used to work for when we were living in L.A. If you click on their link his voice is the first one you hear (right before Bono's, hehe): http://www.bestbuddies.org/site/c.ljJ0J8MNIsE/b.1162355/k.BF9F/Intro.htm

Unfortunately, my 15 minutes happens to feature a very unattractive picture of me. Click on the below link, enter Soleil @ K, skip the intro, and you will see me making a serious ugly face:

http://www.soleilatk.com/

I was part of this photo shoot when I worked for the agency that handled their advertising. Glad to know the nastiest picture of me in existence is on display for all the world to see.

Anyway, thought I would share the misfortune of my 15 minutes of fame. If you want to send me yours, good or bad, I'll post it for all the world to see as well, if they haven't already.

I'm inspired to also tell tales of my brushes with actual fame, in a future blogging series I shall call "The Celebrity Chronicles". Starting with my earliest brush with fame featuring a late 80's/early 90's cheesey television series icon who is most famous for playing a character known to bust out hilarious dance moves while rocking such fashionable items as pink polo shirts with sweaters tied around his shoulders. Alas, I fear I have given too much information already, but if you are still dying to find out stay tuned...(but you might have to wait another month or two seeing how busy this semester is going to be for me).

Peace out y'all.

And They Lived Happily Ever After

2007-08-03T13:17:00.001-07:00

I went to Vons yesterday and as I was walking out I noticed a table full of used books that was placed in the entry way to the store. Out of curiosity, I stopped to see what it was for. Apparantly Vons is accepting donations of used books and asking customers to buy them for $1 in order to raise money for the Muscular Distrophy Foundation. Being the good Samaritan that I am, I perused the book selection to see if there was anything remotely of interest that I might want to purchase. Let me tell you, after browsing through stacks of books, I realize now that there is a lot of c-r-a-p out there in terms of books that have been written. I mean, really? How many cheesey romance novels gracing the face of Fabio can the world handle? I think my 7 month old nephew can write better stuff than what there is out there! Not that I'm the most well-read person, but come on, even I have standards when it comes to books.

But I shouldn't judge. If "A Restless Knight" is your idea of a good read, then stop by your local Vons today!

I suppose if I really were a good Samaratin I would have bought some of those books just out of good will, but I think I'd prefer to donate the money and get nothing in return.

Friends...How Many Others Have Them?

2007-08-02T14:54:00.001-07:00

It's been waaay, waay too long.

If not for Suzanna prodding me on to post my lazy ass might never have done so. I've just been enjoying my summer break too much after a full year of school madness. What have I been doing you ask? Well, I can tell you that a lot of nothing certainly seems to take up a good amount of time.

I was reading Jenna Fischer's (Pam from The Office) myspace blog and it inspired me to blog. She just got nominated for an Emmy and this is what she wrote:

"Man…I am so excited. I just can't tell you what this means to me. Not because it is an award or something like that. But because it feels like it is for our gal Pam. She's a shy girl who doesn't get recognized very often you know. It's like…that shot from the episode with the Art Show where Pam is standing in front of her display waiting for the first visitor to come by…that just sums it all up for me. So, I guess I feel it in that part of me that is Pam. The part that still gets excited to show my art and hopes people are responding to it. It's like…Hey, people showed up to my art show!" (Retrieved from http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=27753303&blogID=289507082 on August 1st, 2007)

If you haven't seen the episode I highly recommend you check it out. In fact, I highly recommend watching each and every episode of The Office because I heart it so much. Anyway, I really connected with what she said because I think in a lot of ways I relate to Pam. I kind of feel like that girl who would put on an art show and hope that people would show up, because I think I would do the same for them. But then maybe nobody would show up. I guess this blog is like my art show, and the people who I know truly are my friends come in and check it out because they really care about what matters to me. So thanks Kyle, Suzanna, Cherann, and anyone else who is out there that finds me interesting enough to check up on me every now and then.

I know this sounds like a depressing blog, but really I've been doing fine lately. I've just been contemplating the fact that I have an unhealthy way of romanticizing friendships. I've always wanted to have friends a' la "Friends", "St. Elmo's Fire", "Saved by the Bell", and "How I Met Your Mother" style, where you just see them all the time and can go and drop by their place without having to make big plans whenever you feel like it. I think other people actually do have those friendships, but I think I tend to get lost in the crowd so I'm the kind of person people just want to hang out with one on one style. I don't know what it is. I know I should stop wishing for things that can't be changed, but I think I just crave that socialization aspect so much for whatever reason. It's like a weird sickness. But maybe when I have kids and don't have time for just hanging out I won't think about it so much.

The best part of that Office episode was in the end when Michael showed up and told Pam how proud he was of her. I cried like a baby when that happened. As much as Michael can be such an idiot, you can tell how much his character really cares.

All right, sorry for the introspective, semi-depressing blog. I'll try to be more upbeat and interesting next time around.

Sims Socialization

2007-06-18T08:41:00.000-07:00

Sad news, our poor son was the first guy to get kicked off of So You Think You Can Dance. Tragic. He is dealing with the news well, all things considered. Hehe.

Kyle and I were out having dinner with some friends the other day when I totally put my foot in my mouth and committed one of my usual social faux pas. Our friends were really nice about it, but it got me to thinking about the video game, The Sims. Random segueway, but stick with me here, it'll all come back around eventually. Unlike my beloved husband, I am not much of a gamer, but at one point a few years ago I became obsessed with The Sims. For those of you not familiar with it, it is basically a video game about life with you as the main character. The only real "objective" is to get to the highest rank in your career if you so desire, but the real fun of the game is just tooling around and doing day to day activities like cooking, eating, taking out the trash, and socializing. It doesn't sound that fun when I describe it, but trust me, it gets very addicting. I don't know why, I can barely bring myself to cook and take out the trash in real life but when it comes to doing it in the virtual world I could spend hours on end doing it. The part of the game that always fascinated me was the socializing aspect. You get points for every person you socialize with and the game tells you on a scale of 1 to 100 how much that person likes/doesn't like you. The best part is that whenever you interact with that person, these positive or negative signs pop up above their head to tell you whether your relationship with that person is improving or deteriorating. For months when I would play that game I would find myself in real life social situations, imagining the positive or negative signs above a person's head.

"Hey Jane, I like your dress!" POSITIVE.

"Hey Joe, wanna go grab a drink for happy hour?"
"Actually Cheryl, don't you remember I gave up drinking after I got that DUI?" NEGATIVE.

The problem with real life is that more times than not I think people tend to hide how they are really feeling about you, so no matter how hard I try to see the positive or negative signs above someone's head sometimes they just refuse to let you in. So I think the lesson for myself here is to stop trying to figure out what they are thinking or feeling. In contrast, I think of myself as someone who wears my heart on my sleeve, and often it takes a lot for someone to illicit a negative out of me and not very much for the positives.

"Hi Cheryl." POSITIVE
"How's it going?" POSITIVE POSITIVE
"Want to grab a cup of coffee with me and go shopping?" POSITIVE x 1 million

Anyone who takes the coffee and shopping route is on the fast track to 100 points in my book!

Sweet Child O' Mine

2007-06-11T09:45:00.000-07:00

You know those morphing machines they have at Dave N' Busters where you take a picture with your significant other and out spits an image of what your child is supposed to look like? Most of the ones I've seen produce children of mutant-like qualities, so hopefully they aren't very accurate. I've always been curious to see what it would look like if Kyle and I tried it out, but I've never been willing to pony up the small fortune needed in order to get a picture that I'll likely throw away 5 seconds later. Instead I prefer to spend my money on playing games like skee ball and Tetris that will earn me tickets to buy junk in the form of stuffed animals and rubber balls that I will throw away 5 seconds later.

Imagine my utter horror when I found out what our child could possibly looked like as Kyle and I were watching So You Think You Can Dance and he turned to me and said, "That guy is what our kid could look like." "That guy" being this guy:

Okay, so he doesn't look so bad in this picture but on the show he just seems really weird, and coming from me, the queen of weird, that says a lot. I am worried for our future child because my mom is convinced that since Kyle and I will be having a bi-racial child, he/she will be the most amazing looking child ever to walk the planet. I once knew a girl in college who was herself a product of a bi-racial coupling and she said that in her opinion, bi-racial children are either really good looking or really strange looking. I realize that the idea of bi-racial children being beautiful is one big stereotype, but I can't argue too much since my bi-racial godchildren, the offspring of Cherann, are gorgeous themselves. I have this fear that since there is already high expectations for our child's looks, if he/she is anything less than perfect than they will be shunned. Totally irrational, I know.

What do you think? Does

= ?

I would prefer having children that look like this:

or this:

No pressure indeed.

Side note: I have to say that good advertising really does work, as I am obsessed with finding out what the ending of Hostel II is since the commercial says it is an ending that will be talked about by everyone or something to that effect, but I am too much of a wuss to even google it because I hate scary/gory movies and I am afraid of actually seeing an image of what is underneath that bag. But if anyone out there goes to see it or finds out, please satisfy my curiosity for me and let me know what the heck happens in the end!

Bloggers Block

2007-06-05T12:37:00.000-07:00

So I figure I ought to post before I lose the two readers I have right now. Even though I'm officially on summer vacation and should theoretically have much more time to blog than I did before, I'm discovering that a) I'm going through major bloggers block and b) I really don't have as much time as I thought I would. I envisioned spending my summer getting caught up on my life and those of my friends, possibly reading a good book or two, and relaxing at the beach. Instead it has been a whirlwind of dirty diapers (babysitting Marcus), constant e-mailing to catch up with the odd jobs I've been doing, and various family gatherings (birthdays, graduations, etc.). Not that I should be complaining or anything, as it's a welcome change from the continual stresses of grad school.

I guess I've been feeling pretty un-original lately, hence I have not had much of interest that I felt warranted the space that I would take up in the bloggerverse. I have, however, been perusing others' blogs in my spare time. For example, two of my friends were in a debate about whether or not Kelly Kapowski actually sang the song "Blue Moon" in a talent show, so in an attempt to settle their disagreement I tried googling it since everyone knows that anything that shows up in writing on the internet is a tried and true fact. All of a sudden, a bazillion blog entries about Saved by the Bell popped up and I was in blogger heaven. I mean, who knew that so many other people shared a sick fascination for bad 90's television that I thought made me so unique? Anyway, there are some really good bloggers out there. In fact, I don't think I've met a blog that I haven't liked so far. I guess that's what makes it so easy to waste away hours on mindless google searches.

I do have to say that I saw the movie "Knocked Up" and it was hilarious. Kyle and I were talking about what a good job it does of portraying both the male and the female point of view in relationships. The most classic scene was where this husband (played by Paul Rudd of "Clueless", "Friends", and a more obscure role in "Romeo + Juliet" with Claire Daines & Leonardo DiCaprio) and his wife (played by an actress whose name I don't know but I think she played Adam Sandler's ex-girlfriend in "Big Daddy") were arguing about something he had done, and he frustratedly tells her, "Just tell me what you want me to do!". To which she so eloquently replied, "I don't want to tell you what to do, I want you to do it because you want to do it because you love me, not because I tell you to do it!" Yes, I have used that line on more than a few occassions, and I'd be willing to bet the farm that more than a few women residing in the world of marital bliss have too.

My Friend Izzy

2007-05-09T21:00:00.000-07:00

Surprisingly, I am not into Grey's Anatomy like the rest of the women in the free world. You would think it would be right up my alley what with my lifelong television addiction, but such is not the case for whatever reason. I think it has been hyped up so much in my mind that I just don't even think anything will live up to my expectations at this point.

Imagine my surprise when I ran into Katherine Heigl when I was out wine tasting in Temecula.

Okay, I lie. That's actually my friend C, one of the sweetest gals I've ever met. We actually were wine tasting in Temecula to celebrate her graduation from law school - brains and beauty, how jealous am I? Ever since I met her I've harped on how much she is the spitting image of Izzy.

Anyway, just thought I'd share. It's fun to know celebrity look-a-likes. One of my classmates says that she had a friend who looked just like Anna Nicole Smith, and now she's bummed because she can't get away with pretending to be her anymore. The only person I've ever been mistaken for is a Victoria's Secret model when I'm at the beach doing the "about to drop my drawers" pose. LOL!

I Did It!

2007-05-08T13:49:00.000-07:00

After starving myself for the past four hours and working out like a mad woman, I finally achieved my perfect bikini body:

This is so not healthy...

Perfect Bikini Body

2007-05-08T09:18:00.000-07:00

I get these e-mails from Victoria's Secret online informing me of their once a year sales (that actually happen every other day). Given the fact that summer is coming up, I decided to peruse their swimwear section. What started out as looking for a cute swimsuit turned into me shopping for the perfect bikini body.

On a side note, what the hell is up with the whole posing like you're about to pull your bottoms down deal? Seemed to be a common theme in the Vicky's online catalog.

Every year I promise myself I will be good and work out before summer hits. I can only think of one year that I actually did it, and that was the year that I also ate massive amounts of food at a time so I was just a semi-toned big girl. I fear that getting the perfect bikini body is only a pipe dream for me. Ahh, such is life.

I'm off to see my therapist. We have to attend 10 counseling sessions as part of my program. Lately I've enjoyed throwing the occasional "so, I was talking to my therapist..." into conversations. Makes me feel like Demi Moore in St. Elmo's fire, without the wicked stepmonster and the perfect bikini body.

Ta ta!

Anyone? Bueller?

2007-04-26T17:01:00.000-07:00

Is anyone out there? Bueller? Bueller?

I know at least you are reading P.

I need a hobby. I've determined that watching TV and being up-to-date on pop culture do not qualify as hobbies. I've racked my brain trying to think of hobbies I can take up but have come up with zilch. Suggestions are welcome. Here are some things I enjoy and that I think I am good at:

Playing Scrabble
Drinking wine
Eating food
Petting cats

Cooking - I want to be good at this, but I don't think I'm very good at it. I'm okay, but Kyle is way better than I am. And for some reason every time I cook chicken I feel ill the next day so I think I'm giving myself salmonilla.

Who am I kidding? I don't even have time to do the laundry, clean my desk, take out the recycling. I need to figure out a way to be a fully functioning adult before taking up a hobby!

Does anybody have the phone number for a maid service?

Me & Sanjaya are One

2007-04-25T00:27:00.000-07:00

I was watching American Idol and realized that my internal voice is way too Simon Cowell and not enough Paula Abdul. There are some days when I walk around feeling like I'm Sanjaya and can't do anything right.

Simon: "Cheryl, that was horrendous! Like watching a bad, drunken karaoke bar performance."
Me: "Really? You think I could be good enough to sing at a karaoke bar? Wow, thanks!"

Hardy har. Where oh where is Paula when you need her? At least she would tell me my outfit looks nice.

A Year in the Life

2007-04-20T21:16:00.000-07:00

Happy one year Bloggerversary to me!

Reflections on the past year:

1. Going back to school is not as easy as it sounds.
2. I'm still reminded of my New Years spill by the stubborn bruise on my knee that will not go away.
3. One year is way too long to go without a nice vacation away from it all.
4. Being an aunt is the best.
5. Never say never. Like I said I would never go back to the Brenda Walsh bangs.

I started out with wispy, sideswept bangs. Then I decided I need a change. Slowly but surely, I have digressed back to the days of 90210. Even those damn jumpers with t-shirts underneath are making a comeback. I haven't quite made that leap yet. I think I'll file that under the category of leggings for now. That stereotypical Asian model with bangs thing a la Bai Ling always bugged me, which was partly why I revolted against straight bangs for so long. I guess I'm a conformist at heart!

Randomly, I'm in Santa Barbara this weekend to represent my program at a diversity forum being held at UCSB. Believe it or not, it was actually more the fact that this event focuses on diversity rather than that it was in Santa Barbara that motivated me to want to come when I was invited at the last minute. Of course, I ain't complaining about the locale - just a minor side perk. But instead of having a grand time on State Street I'll be working on my paper/presentation for my child development class. Fun times.

I don't think this can count as my long overdue vacation.

What to Do, What to Do

2007-04-17T22:20:00.000-07:00

TO DO:

Get a pedicure. Gnarly toenails are unacceptable, even in cold weather.
School work (what's new?)
Finish traffic school online. Funny when you read about how you shouldn't drive when you are emotional, which is pretty much what I was doing when that cursed photo light caught me.
Go on that bikini body diet I've been talking about for months (now that there are only about 2 months left until summer begins).
Get a massage & plan a vacation. Relaxation time is key.
Start writing in a journal again. Blogging is fun and all, but there are just some things not meant for public consumption.
Blog more.
Go to the gym (can't wait until I actually check this one off my list!).
Buy Elliot Yamin CD. I was a Taylor Hicks fan but his CD kind of disappointed. I hear Elliot's is the bomb yo! (Sorry, temporarily possessed by the spirit of Randy Jackson)
Buy more closed toe shoes (in case #1 is not realized).

Meme?

2007-04-13T11:29:00.000-07:00

Apparantly I've been tagged to fill out a meme. Before today I didn't even know what a meme is so if this post actually even goes through it will be a miracle. I guess I didn't realize before getting into blogging how technically literate I would have to be.

Three things that scare me

PUBLIC SPEAKING
Being judged (goes into #1)
The idea of anyone other than my beloved husband who loves me unconditionally seeing me first thing in the morning when I wake up.

Three people who make me laugh

1. I Love Cheese
2. Dave Chapelle
3. Me (hence the blog name)

Three things I love

1. I have to go with Cherann on this one - my family

2. The Office

"Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject, so you know you are getting the best possible information." - Michael Scott

3. Food

When people think they are better than others
Inconsiderateness
Being hungry

Three things I don’t understand

1. How anyone could not love food

2. How on earth leggings ever made a comeback

3. Intolerance

A stack of papers taller than me
A video game case for World of Warcraft (Kyle's doing, not mine. Not that WoW isn't cool or anything, I'm just sayin'.)
More paper

If Kyle hadn't just cleaned it I'm sure there would be a million water bottles on my desk too (my doing, not Kyle's).

Be serenaded by John Legend (only a song Kyle, nothing more of course!)
Meet Barack Obama (Obama in '08!)

3. Be a mommy.

Cook a 30-minute meal
Trick my husband into getting into bad reality TV shows (The Search for the Next Pussycat Doll, The Hills, etc.)
Laugh a lot

1. Pretend I know something that I don't

2. Motivate myself to work out
3. Swim

Three things I think you should listen to

The good things people say about you
John Legend's "Get Lifted"
Yourself

Three things you should never listen to I try to be pretty open minded so I can't think of anything you shouldn't listen to. Of course, that doesn't mean you have to do everything that anyone says. I'll have to come back to you on that one.

How to be completely non-judgmental
How to stop thinking about what everyone else is thinking
How Anna Nicole Smith could be so blind as to what a sleazoid Howard K. Stern is

Three shows I watched as a kid

1. The Guys Next Door

2. The Monkees (yes, I was boy band crazed even at a young age)

3. Saved by the Bell

Now for the very special part….Tag, you’re it! You're turn to tell me three things. Have fun!

I Love Cheese

Thanks for the tag Cherann!

The Man, the Myth, the LEGEND

2007-04-05T10:25:00.000-07:00

OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!

Can I just tell you how much I absolutely heart John Legend? Kyle and I went to his concert last night with a few friends and he 100% blew my mind with how awesome he was. You know somebody is good when they sound even better LIVE than they do on their CD.

It doesn't hurt that he's pretty easy on the eyes too. I don't think Kyle would mind my mini-celebrity crush since he has developed one of his own for Mr. Legend's opening act, Carin Bailey Rae.

I knew I was in trouble when Kyle first saw her perform and realized that she can play the guitar, but then she had to go and reveal the fact that she has the coolest British accent ever last night. If I could come back as somebody else in another lifetime I would want to come back as a Brit because I'm convinced that no matter what your personality is like, if you have a British accent you are golden. So:

Good looks + good personality + plays the guitar + great singer + BRITISH ACCENT

= Kyle fantasizing about being picked out of a crowd for a marriage proposal from Carin Bailey Rae

I forget how great going to concerts can be. It was held at the Embarcadero downtown, which I think I have been to at some point but can't remember why. Anyway, it was a beautiful night, with the water on one side and a great view of the city on the other. We also discovered that you can pretty much have a picnic right outside the venue and still be able to see and hear the music for free, so I'm thinking I'll have to try it when the next great act comes into town. Although I'm not sure if anything will ever live up to John Legend. Sigh.

In other music related news, did you happen to catch American Idol last night with Michael Buble? Now, Michael Buble is another artist who I've designated as one of my favorites on my myspace page, but I'm feeling like he kind of ruined his image in my eyes with his creepy comment about Antonella Barba. I wonder if he's still dating that British girl from "The Devil Wears Prada"? If he lets go a girl with a British accent then he definitely is a certified fool.

Lackadaisical

2007-04-01T04:33:00.000-07:00

Lackadaisical: adj. idle or indolent, especially in a dreamy way

Yeah, that says it all about me these days. I'm finding I'm lacking in the motivation department lately. I think after all those years I've spent trying to please everyone around me I'm finally getting fed up with it and have started ushering my priorities to the front of the line. So selfish of me, I know. Anyway, it kind of sucks too though because I'm starting to go through this phase where I feel like I'm unlikeable. I think I relied so much on doing whatever it takes to make people happy for years as a means of being liked that now that I'm not doing it as much I am starting to wonder what there is left of me to like.

I'm feeling inconsistent too. I've always felt like I'm not the same me around everyone, so now I'm trying to figure out exactly who the "real" me is. Shooz, I definitely thought I was supposed to be more evolved in that aspect at this age. Funny thing is, I feel like I've gone through this already. I was so sure of who I was in my early 20's but now I'm trying to remember who that was. Loss of memory, another tragic side effect of aging.

Anyway, I know this post is a downer but it's 4 in the morning right now and I guess introspection is what happens when sleep escapes you. Overall things are fine. Spring Break came and went, but wasn't really much of a break if you ask me. I went to a School Counseling conference on Friday where I was part of a group presentation. If you know me at all, you know that public speaking is my greatest fear in life, so I was mentally blocking out most other things this whole week in preparation for the presentation. It went well. I actually didn't feel nervous, but for some reason could still feel my hands shaking when I was up there in front of all those eyes on me. I think my physiological response overrides my actual mental state. Any suggestions on how to control it are more than welcome!

Steppin' It Up

2007-03-16T20:42:00.000-07:00

I was working with a student the other day and we were talking about the lyrics to a song that she idenitifies with. Here's a song that I'm trying to identify more with these days:

"Control" - Janet Jackson

This is a story about control
My control
Control of what I say
Control of what I do
And this time I'm gonna do it my way (my way)
I hope you enjoy this as much as I do
Are we ready?
I am
'Cause it's all about control (control)
And I've got lots of it

When I was 17 I did what people told me, uhh!
Did what my father said,
and let my mother mold me
But that was long ago
I'm in

Control
Never gonna stop
Control
To get what I want
Control
I like to have a lot
Control
Now I'm all grown up

First time I fell in love, I didn't know what hit me
So young and so naive, I thought it would be easy
Now I know I got to take

Control
Now I've got a lot, ow!
Control
To get what I want
Control
I'm never gonna stop
Control
Now I'm all grown up

Jam, ooh ooh
Rebel, that's right
I'm on my own,
I'll call my own shots
Thank you

Got my own mind
I wanna make my own decisions
When it has to do with my life, my life
I wanna be the one in control

So let me take you by the hand,
and lead you in this dance
Control
It's what I got,
because I took a chance
I don't wanna rule the world,
just wanna run my life
So make your life a little easier
When you get the chance just take
Control

There are more lyrics but it kind of gets repetitive after that so I'll spare you. It's funny, you never realize how many oohs and aahs there are in a song until you actually look at the lyrics on paper.

Anyway, my point is that lately I've sort of felt out of control of my life. I have a tendency to put pressure on myself based on what other people want from me and not what I want for myself. I think the main part of the song that is true to how I feel about "Control" is that "I don't wanna rule the world, just wanna run my life." Basically, here's how I rank my priorities in life:

1. Family/friends
2. School
3. Work

Lately it has not been that way, and I can only blame myself for that. Maybe I'm destined for mediocrity but I've never been one to try to strive to be the "best" at anything. I think I've blogged about this before - being the "best" is so relative and in no way the same for everyone, so I only want to be the best at doing what makes me happy.

I've always been really terrible at saying "No" when someone asks me to do something (hence, the 100+ hour work weeks when I was in advertising). I'm going to try to practice it more because ultimately, if I don't, I'll just become really resentful and bitter. Again, noone to blame but myself. If only I was taught how to do that better...I think it goes into how culturally, it was always emphasized that I had to respect my elders, don't question what they say, etc. I used to totally get into trouble if I said "No" to my parents. But I really think I should put more stock into myself and know that if I do say no to someone then that doesn't mean they'll ultimately hate me, and even if they did, so be it. We should all respect each other's priorities rather than trying to force our own on everyone else and thinking that anyone who doesn't share our same priorities is weird or crazy. If you are someone that loves working 100+ hours per week, more power to you I say!

Wow, that was a release. I think all this self counseling in school is getting to me.

Nice Girl

2007-03-08T23:13:00.000-08:00

I wrote this post last week but have been waiting to post it because I can't get my darn scanner to work properly. Oh well, here it is, excuse the shoddy quality of the below pics due to an ill functioning piece of crap scanner:

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I think I have blogger's remorse. Every time I think to blog I start making a mental list of all the things I should be doing, like studying, getting sleep, spending more time with Kyle, etc. Then when I finally do go to blog I feel like I have to apologize for it or something. I think it may be the Catholic in me. What can I say, guilt is a powerful thing. Perhaps this is the real reason why I have been so remiss in my entries.

So I heard a funny conversation the other day on the radio as I was driving to school listening to the hits of the 80's, 90's and today. I think it's funny when people who are so out of the loop try to get back in the loop and then end up totally not getting what being in the loop really is about. I know this is vague...let me explain. This kind of dorky sounding DJ dude was talking about how he just started getting into reading blogs, and he discovered the word, "meh". He defined it as a "verbal shrug", and even had a theory as to where the word derived from - I think he said some word in Yiddish or something. So he proceeds to end his segment by saying, "The next time someone says something to you that you are ambivalent about, just say 'meh'." Now I could totally be the one out of the loop here, but in my estimation there are certain things that you write in the blogosphere that you totally wouldn't say in real life, "Meh" being one of those things. It's okay to say "Eh" (which is really where I think it came from), but would a real live person ever really say "Meh"? Maybe if they listened to this radio show they might. But that would be like saying "LOL!" after someone told you a joke, or ummm, now I can't come up with anymore examples, but you know what I mean. Just don't say "meh" around me so I don't feel dumb for spending 10 minutes writing about it, okay? I just think blogosphere lingo should be it's own language meant only to be written and not spoken out loud. Hmm, I wonder what one would call it? Bloglish? Bloginese (sounds too much like bolognese)? Blogalog? Yeah, I like that one.

Speaking of reading blogs, the other day I was perusing a blog I frequent fairly regularly and the blogger was talking about how she wouldn't want to be friends with someone who is known as "nice". Which got me to thinking about how on a few occassions lately I've been told how "nice" I am. But honestly, when people tell me that, sometimes I just feel like a huge fraud. I mean I try to treat people well and all, but I think I do have those judgmental tendencies that are maybe just inherent in all of us. I am trying to make a conscious effort to tone down the judgmentalness, but it sho' is hard. I guess I can say I'm pretty optimistic, to the point where sometimes I even disgust myself, but I wonder if optimism and niceness necessarily go hand in hand. Nice just sounds so boring sometimes. Although I do think I would take pride in being tolerant by understanding that not everyone thinks the same way as I do, and trying to see the positive about people rather than the negative.

You know what IS nice of me? The fact that I am going to bestow upon you the menu for Board & Brew, my very favorite sandwich place in all of San Diego. My friends and I used to drive all the way down to L.A. just for a tasty morsel of Board & Brew sandwiches with their oh so delicioso sweet and sour sauce. The other day I was looking for their menu online and when I couldn't find it I thought I would post it on my blog as a service to the minions of sweet and sour sauce loving foodies out there. I present to you...dadadaDA...the Board & Brew Menu:

You can thank me one day by buying me a Turkey Deluxe with extra sweet & sour sauce on the side. I am now going to google "Board & Brew Menu" to see if my blog comes up and yes, I do know that is nerdy of me, and no, I don't so much care. I've learned to take ownership of my nerdiness after all these years.

Back from the Dead

2007-02-28T13:40:00.000-08:00

Has it really been a month since I last blogged? Well, I can believe it. It's been crazy crazy because I've been helping plan a school counseling event which just ended yesterday. Now I can return to the things I love, such as Kyle, spending time with my baby nephew Marcus, and of course blogging. Not that I'm entirely sure I have much to blog about since my time has been consumed with event planning but just wanted to check in and let y'all know I'm still alive and well.

One thing I do have to say is that this has been the most dismal year of American Idol yet. I seriously cannot say who I think would be a great American Idol, whereas in the past I have always by now chosen the winner and, not to brag, but most of the time I've been right. Except season 1 when I wanted Tamyra Gray to win, but now I definitely think Kelly Clarkson deserved the title. I'm sure Tamyra is just as happy with her Color Me Badd husband as she would have been had she been crowned the AI winner. Also, I was in denial about Carrie Underwood since I'm not too into the country thing.

I'm at the library right now trying to catch up on studying, which is of course why I am blogging. Hehe, just needed a little break. I'm sitting next to the "Witchery" section of library books, which I did not even know existed until today. There's even a book about how to be a Teen Witch. I had picked it up thinking that it was related to that awesome 90's made for TV movie starring the chick with the red hair who discovered she was a witch. If you know what I'm talking about then you watch entirely too much TV, just like me.

Okay, back to my exciting world of textbooks on testing and anger management!

My Friend the Editing Queen

2007-01-29T23:09:00.000-08:00

My friend Suzanna has started to read my blog, which I am very happy about (hi Suzanna!). However, this puts me into an interesting conundrum, as she is the master editor in our cohort and I am known to be guilty of the occassional typo or two. In fact, I just re-read a few of my last entries and found a few, but had to resist the temptation of going back to fix them (eh-too much work). For now, I will just have to beg her forgiveness for the misspellings until one day, probably when I am procrastinating on some assignment, I go back and fix all of my corrections. You know how they say owls can spot a tiny rat from miles away? Well they ain't got nothin' on Suzanna and typos! Hehe, one of the many things I admire about her. :)

My schedule is in full effect right now. Just got back from a class where one of my ongoing assignments is to counsel myself. Good times! Talk about an awkward conversation. Would it be cheating if I just wrote out a script in advance and then read it into the tape recorder that the instructor will be listening to? At the very least, I can work on my acting skills.

This is the End, the Beautiful End My Friend.

2007-01-11T15:09:00.000-08:00

I'd like to take a moment to mourn the passing of a dear, special friend of mine called Winter Break. Oh what wonderful times we spent together. I'll never forget the morning when we slept in until 9:20 and woke up for Rachael Ray, or how you were always there for me to find time to go grocery shopping at a time when I didn't have to stand in mile long lines. At least we still have one precious week together, during which I can pay visits to my other dear friends and walk around without my shoulders rising to my head out of stress. So sad.

I ate a banana, fruit bar, and smoothie last night for dinner thinking I was being healthy and all day long today my stomach has been tied in knots. I don't think it's used to food that isn't deep fried or full of fat anymore. I'm sure it was all that fiber too.

As you can tell by the beginning of this post, I'm bracing myself for a long, agonizing semester. My schedule is pretty crazy. I just have to remind myself that it will all be worth it in the end. Kyle always tells me how lucky I am to have school stress instead of work stress. In my opinion, no stress is good stress, but I guess being able to have school stress is a nice break from the 7+ years of work stress I have under my belt.

Speaking of belts (best transition ever!), I was shopping at this cheapy fashion store recently and was thinking about how when I was in my early 20's I used to think I wouldn't be shopping at cheapy fashion stores in my 30's. Lo and behold, I still feel like $20 is too much to pay for a shirt and I refuse to buy shoes other than boots that cost more than $30 so that leaves my only options being the Everything $5 stores and other such inexpensive clothing outlets. But I was reading In Style and it said that if you are buying trendy stuff you really don't need to buy brand name. Who knew that I was in style all along?

I was out with some friends one night, and a few of the people I was with were text messaging all through dinner. This got me to start thinking about how technologically dependent we've become even in a social aspect. Being social used to mean going out and interacting face to face with people, but now with the advent of My Space, Facebook, Friendster, match.com, cell phones, and Blackberries, such socialization is almost becoming obsolete. I just thought it was pretty ironic that here we were all hanging out together in person, and there was more interest in typing out messages on a phone than in having live conversations with those around us. I was also at a bar one time and one of the guys there had his laptop and was My Spacing the whole time. So interesting how we've evolved, or in my opinion, regressed in this sense. Really, I think I'm guilty of it myself. I have a lot harder time holding an interesting conversation with people than I do writing e-mails or blogging.

I know this post was random, but I had to get all of these thoughts out there since when school starts I might not have time to think of anything else!

Like Butta

2007-01-05T21:36:00.000-08:00

This is funny:

Cheryl --
[adjective]:

Similar to butter in texture and appearance

'How" will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Not sure how I feel about that. Actually, I'm just not sure what it really means. Anyone care to offer their interpretation?

Kyle's rocks:

Kyle --
[adjective]:

Like in nature to a banana peel

'How" will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

My banana peel husband.

Cheryl Goes Boom!

2007-01-05T11:24:00.000-08:00

I forgot to tell you guys about how I managed to fall on the pavement right in the middle of downtown on New Years. I wasn't even drunk either! Somehow I manage to consistently fall and hurt myself for no apparant reason. There was the time I twisted my ankle just walking down a hill by the Mesa Court dorms at UC Irvine. Then I fell right in front of the oh-so-trendy Chateau Marmont on Sunset Blvd with a group of snobby onlookers as witnesses while my friend just ran ahead out of embarrassment to be seen with me. Needless to say she isn't my friend anymore (not for that reason alone though).

But I'm okay, just a scraped up hand and knee and a bruised ego to boot. Actually, I've started to get so used to it that I don't even get very embarrassed anymore. How sad is that? Kyle thinks it's weird that everytime we walk together I try to hang onto his arm, but really if it wasn't for doing that I might be dead by now.

New Years was good times. We went to The Field for some hearty Irish fare and tasty libations. For some reason though, when midnight struck, our night turned into a series of ill-fated events straight out of a poorly written Will Ferrel movie. I won't delve into the sordid details, but the capper was that we had a crazy cab driver who got so mad at us for changing our minds about where we wanted to get dropped off that he almost stranded us in the middle of the 163 freeway. He literally stopped at an exit and threatened to drop us off so that we could walk our ways back to downtown while dodging drunk drivers going 80+ miles per hour. While our New Years Eve celebration before our crazy adventures was fun and all, it just reminded me and Kyle of why most of the time during New Years, we just make it a Blockbuster night.

I'm going to reserve my spot on the couch for Decmeber 31st 2007 right now.

I am an Aunt (Part II)!

2007-01-03T11:22:00.000-08:00

equanimity: n., mental or emotional stability or composure, esp. under tension or strain; calmness; equilibrium.

I am officially, legitimately an aunt with a little nephew with five fingers and toes. Now, I may be a little biased, but I think he is the cutest thing ever!

Although I've been on break for a while now, with the birth of Marcus, the various odd jobs I've been taking on, and a lovely visit from Mary Ann and her friend Ros, little time has been afforded for me to blog. However, I have thought of many things I've been wanting to blog about, 99% of which escape me at this moment. I swear that with my advanced age I am losing more and more of my memory. This seems to irk many people since I forget important details about friend's lives, from the kind of car they drive to the country they live in (really, that happened once!). Does this make me a bad friend? Well, in my mind, I don't care about them any less than I used to, but I am trying to make a concerted effort to pay better attention.

Back to Marcus - he is really healthy, active, and alert. He's already got the pressure on him to be really smart, because all of the family seems to agree that he seems to be paying attention to everything around him, even though they say he can't see past a few inches at such a young age.

Maybe I should take some lessons from him on how to pay attention. You would think my mom would take a break from pressuring me to have kids now that she finally has the grandchild she has always wanted, but now it seems like the pressure is on even more since she wants a granddaughter to complete the set and seems intent on me and Kyle providing one to her ASAP. I've just resorted myself to the fact that no matter how many times I explain to her that I have to wait until I'm done with school her persistence will never wane.

The other day we were over at Cathee and Mike's house just staring at Marcus, and he started getting fussy and flailing his arms about.

Dad: "He's looking for his thumb to suck on."

Me: "As long as he doesn't suck it until he's five years old, like I did."

Mom: "That's why you're so calm all the time, because you used to pacifiy yourself when you were young so you don't get upset easily."

Now, I've always been told that I have a certain quality of equanimity about me, but never really thought about that as one of the reasons. It makes sense to me though. So maybe sucking your thumb will cause you to need braces later in life, but at least you'll be a conent person, right?

Today is supposed to be my first official day of relaxation during my vacation. Actually, it was supposed to be yesterday but some last minute stuff had to be taken care of, and I spent the day running around as usual. Today I've been doing pretty good on the relaxation front:

9:20AM - Wake up

9:20-10:00AM - Watch Rachael Ray

10:00AM-10:45AM - Watch The View and read Barack Obama's new book during commerical breaks

10:45AM-11:15AM - Check e-mail, fantasy celebrity scores, etc.

11:15AM-11:50AM - Blog

Hopefully I'll eventually get around to taking a shower. Me = gross.

Tis the Season

2006-12-11T12:56:00.000-08:00

I only have time to blog when I'm working on papers, although technically it's not really that I have the time it's just that I'm sitting at the computer trying as hard as I can to not work on my papers. I actually only have one more to go, which you would think would be major motivation for me to just sit my ass down and finish the darn thing already, but alas, such is not the case. I am happy to have almost survived a whole semester however - only four more to go!

By the way, if any of you are reading this and do not have my new cell phone number send me an e-mail. I text messaged everyone in my phone with the new digits but it seems that not everyone got it, probably because I'm from the stone age and don't have expertise in the area of text messaging. Seriously, I was text messaging back and forth with this guy Andy from my cohort about class and it would take me something like 20 minutes to write one sentence. I hear that text messaging is becoming a problem at some middle and high schools because students know how to do it without looking so they can send messages really discreetly. Without looking! As it is I am probably already ruining my already legally blind eyesight by squinting and putting the phone right up to my face when I'm trying to text message.

You know what I hate? When people get mad at you for not knowing something they know and try to treat you like an idiot because of it. Case in point, I was voluntereing at Barnes & Noble the other day doing a giftwrapping fundraiser and I asked the manager if he wouldn't mind if I posted a sign on one of the racks. He snaps back with, "Yes I would mind, you can only put posters on the table!" in a very rude and annoyed tone. Well dude, why do you think I was asking?! I understand he was probably busy and all, but there is no need to be condescending to someone who just asked me a simple question. I'm a customer too you know. In fact, I spent almost 100 bucks there that day. Who knew volunteering could be so expensive?

Thankful

2006-11-27T22:21:00.000-08:00

Welcome back from Thanksgiving break y'all.

What I'm thankful for:

1. That I'm #1 in my celebrity fantasy league - go Britney! And thanks to Heidi Klum for FINALLY having her baby.
2. More babies on the way - my nephew Marcus and Joyce's little girl due shortly thereafter.
3. Going to Joyce's baby shower in the same house where we used to study for classes in the 7th grade and seeing all of her Filipino family rockin' out on the Magic Mic.
4. Being done with my final presentation in one of my classes - only three more classes to go!
5. That after eating about five Thanksgiving dinners I was somehow miraculously able to squeeze into the jeans I bought last week with the Macy's gift card I got for my birthday (thanks again Grandma Bobbie!).
6. Eating five Thanksgiving dinners.
7. My new cute pink Razr phone that really looks more purple to me in certain lights. One step closer to being just like my idol, Paris Hilton (puke)!
8. Swearing off alcohol the morning after a night of binge drinking. Then breaking said promise later the same day.
9. Seeing how happy mom and dad were to spend time with Kyle and I at Pechanga, even though it didn't quite turn out to be the romantic vacation we were hoping for.
10. Patient husbands who endure their quirky wives and families, all with a smile on their face.

What a lucky girl I am.

Do the Shuffle

2006-11-17T15:11:00.000-08:00

I'm working on another major paper right now and listening to my iPod shuffle for inspiration. I've decided that I am the epitome of random. One minute I was jamming to a profanity laced Dr. Dre track, the next I've transitioned into the swinging sounds of Michael Buble. Now it's on Jack Johnson. Do you think my eclectic taste in music is a sign of indecisiveness? Nah, I'm not indecisive. Or maybe I am??

My newest obsession is my Celebrity Fantasy League. Now that Kyle has Fantasy Football, I had to have my girl version. I did good picking Britney right after the breakup, but whoever has Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes is going to be doing laps around me this weekend! My only hope is that Heidi Klum will have her baby soon...I don't understand what it is with most of the females I know being fascinated with celebrity lives but it just seems to be the norm these days.

You Say It's Your Birthday!

2006-11-07T13:26:00.000-08:00

Happy birthday to me! Haha, feels weird to wish myself a happy b-day but I think I really wanted an excuse to post this funny picture:

Should be an exciting day waiting for the electrician to show up and going to back to back classes tonight from 4p-9:40p. Yay!

My sweet sweet husband sent me a nice birthday e-mail so that certainly makes it all worthwhile. :) Oh yeah, and Pam from The Office accepted my friend request so I'm excited about that too. Love The Office!

Kiss Me Mint

2006-11-06T07:50:00.000-08:00

I bought this new Colgate toothpaste the other day. The flavor was called "Kiss Me Mint". I'm not sure why I insist on trying different flavors every time I buy a new tube of toothpaste when 9x out of 10 I hate the new flavor. There was definitely a reason behind why I got this one though.

Kyle: "Did you buy this toothpaste because it's purple?"
Me: "It just looked so pretty..."

I have an unnatural obsession with purple. Anyway, turns out the toothpaste tastes like a combination between Koolaid (Kyle's take) and Laffy Taffy (mine). So if you like the feeling of a mouthful of foamy candy in your mouth you should get it. If not, stick with the regular mint flavors. I find blue and green are safe colors when it comes to toothpaste.

Lesson of the Day: Aesthetics are not necessarily a direct reflection of taste.

Haha, I just googled "Colgate - Kiss Me Mint" and someone is selling an 8-pack on e-bay. Really? Who buys their toothpaste on ebay?

My Life as a Celebrity

2006-11-02T23:12:00.000-08:00

Somehow I find it hard to envision Laura Linney playing me in a movie version of my life. Who is Kim Smith anyway?

Noooo - Not Mr. Eko!

2006-11-02T15:45:00.000-08:00

I am sadly in mourning over the loss of my favorite "Lost" character, Mr. Eko. This now means that all of the tailies (except for that one dude married to Rose) have either died or disappeared. Whatever happened to that one chick who disappeared in the jungle anyway? Even though I thought last night's episode of "Lost" was the best one by far this season, I am still devastated that we won't have Mr. Eko to look forward to anymore. And it is no consolation that they have added in that random chick and guy to try to compensate for their dwindling character base. Who the heck are they anyway? So not interesting to me. Their presence just feels so forced. Blah. I feel like one of the things I like most about this show is it's diversity but now they've gotta go and kill all the people of color. I just like to see more representation of different ethnicities in media. I know, call me crazy.

R.I.P. Eko.

Be My Baby

2006-10-29T23:16:00.000-08:00

ubiquitous - adj. being or seeming to be everywhere at the same time; omnipresent

It's late, I should be joining Kyle in the land of slumberhood but thought I'd post a quick post now that I've just finished my homework. Here are some pics from my sister's baby shower yesterday:

My arm looks all crooked in that first shot because I'm trying to avoid the ubiquitous arm fat shot. Yeah, you ladies know what I'm talking about. And those of you who don't...I hate you. How cool is that car seat made out of playdough creation? Some people are just artistically talented. Don't Robbie and Kyle look excited? I'm not so sure the invention of the co-ed baby shower was such a great idea. I have a feeling most dudes were perfectly happy to not be invited to baby showers for years.

Tomorrow I'm going to be pregnant...pregnant Britney Spears that is. For a Halloween party. I'm doing Britney on Dateline. Denim shorts, smeared mascara, and chipped nails - the whole deal. Because of course, usually my nails are in perfect condition. Right. Just look back at all my old pictures - you won't see an ounce of arm fat or a chipped nail in any of them!

I spent the night at my cousin Cindy's house on Friday to help her with the decorations. She does the most awesome balloons and candy favors. Anyway, we hit up the new H&M in Pasadena. Can I just say I was in hog heaven? Oh how long I have awaited the arrival of an H&M within driving distance. I was wishing they would open one up in San Diego, but after practicing restraint and still managing to spend more than I could afford when I was there, I've decided I can wait a few years until there is an H&M within immediate shopping range. We went to dinner at Mi Piace afterwards, cracked open a bottle of wine and spent some quality bonding girl time together. I haven't had girls night out in a while and I sure needed it.

All right, time for me to retire. G'night all.

Warm Sock Weather

2006-10-23T10:44:00.000-07:00

One of the great things about not having to go anywhere during the day is that one can walk around the house wearing a Hawaiian slip dress, purple warm fuzzy socks, and a hooded zip up sweatshirt and nobody is there to judge you.

I love wearing warm socks when it starts getting cold outside. I love the fall, when the air starts getting brisk and cool and that lovely cold weather woodsy smell fills the air. I don't know where that smell comes from, but I don't care because I just love to take it all in. It's times like these when I can really see myself living somewhere that the sun doesn't shine year round, although being the wussy California girl I am I don't quite know how true that is. At the first sign of weather dipping below 50 degrees I'd probably be out of there. But, if I could "weather" the weather, I would probably get used to it over time. I always think about how nice it would be to live somewhere that you don't have to pay a ba-jillion dollars in order to buy a decent house for your family. If it wasn't for mine and Kyle's family being here in California, I might be all over it. Of course wherever it is would have to have a mall close by because according to Kyle I can't live anywhere that is more than an hour drive to a major shopping center.

Mom and dad were supposed to come today but I talked to dad and it seems that they are going to sit around the house in their socks/Hawaiian garb/zip down sweatshirts today too. It won't be long until they visit though, now that Kyle and I live near their newly discovered favorite Filipino restaurant. Last time they were here, they had lunch there, then went back to have a snack, and then, had it not been for their other favorite place calling, Pechanga Casino, they would have gone back again for dinner. Gotta love mom and dad.

I Don't Want to Want My MTV

2006-10-11T09:31:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I think that if I watch enough hours of sleazy MTV shows I'll automatically be sent to hell when I die. For some reason last night I was sucked into watching "Parental Control". That's the show where the mom and dad who don't like their son/daughter's girlfriend/boyfriend set him or her up with two different dates and then watch the dates with said girlfriend/boyfriend. The whole time, they trade "witty" remarks such as the girlfriend saying to the dad, "Look how ugly that girl is you picked out. You must like ugly girls - look at your wife!" What the...? Seriously, who talks like that to any adult, much less the parents of your boyfriend? Yeah, if that show isn't really one big joke with a bunch of bad actors then I think the entire corporation of MTV may be going to hell too. Ew, and the dad in the episode I watched last night was a total perv. The entire show was just wrong.

On another note, Kyle doesn't know this yet but I almost adopted a cat last night. I was having another bout of insomnia and trying to get myself to fall back asleep again when I heard a cat meowing outside of our apartment. Me being the crazy cat lady that I am opened the door and there was a cute little kitty just sitting there looking up at me with big eyes. So I went up to it and started petting it, and it was the cutest little purrbucket. Then she went into our apartment, and I gave her a bowl of water which she rejected, but after that I was having trouble getting her to leave (probably partly because I didn't want her to leave). I contemplated bringing her into our bedroom where Kyle was sleeping soundly and begging him if I could please please keep her but then reason and flashbacks of our crazy cat Emma (may she rest in peace) got the better of me. She went away eventually but I am secretly hoping for more visits from my new little friend. For now I will stick to my weekly volunteer visits at the Rescue House to get my cat fixes.

Birthday Boy

2006-10-01T20:43:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday to Kyle! Cutest birthday boy ever. Also biggest trooper birthday boy to move tons of boxes during his birthday weekend.

Looks like the birthday boy is happy.

It's amazing how much c*rap one can accumulate over the course of one year. How can we be moving for 3 days straight and not be done yet? Okay, maybe not straight since there was the pet sitting jobs, dinner at grandma's, etc. but Kyle and I have certainly had more of a workout in the past 3 days than we have in the entire past year. Actually, I shouldn't speak for Kyle but I know I did.

Umm, funny story about our move. The first night in our new apartment we decided to take the big room in the front of the apartment even though it was less private and shares a wall with the people next door. We were so exhausted the first night, we were just ready to pass out. Just as soon as the neighbors turned off their TV. Any minute now...still on...they've got to go to sleep sometime, right? WRONG! 11:30 hits and not only is there banging against the wall and a blaring TV combined with people shouting at each other, but the light on the patio just outside of our room still has not turned off so it's like Viva Las Vegas in our bedroom. Seriously, why do apartment complexes feel the need to leave the outside lights on all night long? I mean, I understand it's for security reasons, but really can't you just invest in a sensor - I'm sure it would be cheaper than wasting energy on the lights all night long.

Well, once 11:30 rolled around Kyle and I were having none of the noise and the bright lights, so we made the decision to move all of our bedroom furniture around in the middle of the night from the big room to the small back room just for our own sanity in the long term. Turned out to be a good decision, because even though the other room is smaller it is also pitch black and perfectly quiet at night.

The best part? The loud neighbors moved out today. Happy Birthday to Kyle!

Computer Illiterate

2006-09-24T17:44:00.000-07:00

For some reason it has taken me this long to figure out how to post pictures on my blog, but I think I've finally realized how to do it. You'd think that "image" icon on the top of the post would have tipped me off - duh. Hope this works.

For my first pictures, here's me and Kyle on our wedding day (July 17th, 2004).

Here we are one year later on our first anniversary in Hawaii.

And here we are on our 2-year anniversary this year - first picture was when we celebrated a few days before the actual day at Bali Hai (the restaurant, not the vacation spot) with mom and dad, second is when our broke selves stayed at home to celebrate. A big change from celebrating in Hawaii, but still just as special!

Okay, I'm supposed to be writing a paper right now but I'm doing what I do best - PROCRASTINATING. I'm outties 5000.

Trying to Digest

2006-09-19T23:27:00.000-07:00

I fear something is wrong with my digestive system. Not in a way that I need to go to the doctor or anything, but it just feels a little off. It probably has something to do with the fact that since I started grad school my diet has been totally inconsistent. One day it's Greek food for lunch and then big globs of pasta for dinner, the next it's cereal for breakfast, Starbucks coffee for lunch, then a sandwich and pita chips for dinner (today). Ugh, how unhealthy is that?! Part of the problem I'm discovering is that since I have class at night and sometimes go to campus all day beforehand, it's hard to find things you can bring from home that won't go bad during the day. Anyways, you guys all know how important food is to me so I'm finding this to be a really difficult conundrum for me.

The other thing I'm trying to digest is all this knowledge I'm learning from my classes. The other day we talked about whether thought must be preceded by language or if it can occur even without it. At some point I just want to throw up my hands and say beats the heck out of me! It is really interesting though. Some people argued that babies have thoughts, but the professor countered by saying thoughts of hunger are actually reflexes. The basis of all of this is the theory of social constructionism in post-modern thought, which argues that we construct our own realities through our interactions with other people and there is no such thing as one objective truth. Although I am religious and believe God to be an objective truth, the concept of having free will to me is in line with social constructionism, and I can see how our own constructs have a lot to do with how we perceive reality.

Tonight in my multi-cultural class we talked about white culture. It's interesting how the whole concept of white culture can be thought of as so taboo, but it is a culture nonetheless. The article we read in relation to white culture spoke a lot about white privelege and its existence in our society. As the wife of a white male, I know that I indirectly benefit from white privelege. I also know what it is like to be on the other end of it. I think it is easy for a lot of people to dismiss the notion that there is underlying favoritism towards white people in our society because it is a hard thing to swallow, but I give a lot of credit to those who are able to openly acknowledge it. As assimilated as I am, there have been a lot of times in my life when I have wondered if I would be liked more or get paid more if I were just a part of the white culture.

Busy Bee

2006-09-08T13:09:00.000-07:00

Grad school has had me busy like nothing else so I'm feeling like I have less time to spend thinking of interesting things to blog about. Unless you find syllabi and shopping for school supplies at Staples interesting then you probably don't want to hear about my life right now. So I have a little bit of time before I have to leave for my hair appointment and just thought I'd drop in.

Not to make school sound as uninteresting as it really is. This week I had my first experience actually working at a school and it was such a change from my usual desk job in advertising. I'm really excited about the multi cultural class I'm taking as well. One of our assignments is to immerse ourselves into a culture that is different from our own via attending a gathering, going to a church service, and generally just spending time with a person of another culture. This is something I have actually always wanted to do in life but never had a really good reason to do it until now. Just seeing how different people live their lives is fascinating to me.

Justin is in town this weekend so I have a feeling I won't get a whole lot of school work done. He is one of those people that always has to be out and about doing something, which I don't mind, but it's hard squeezing in entertaining with the millions of other things on my plate. It's all a balancing act man, but totally worth it to spend time with friends who are visiting.

Okay, I'm even boring myself right now. Guess I just had to chronicle the recent happenings in my life.

Addendum

2006-08-31T14:27:00.000-07:00

I must point out an exception to my last blog - I did get to hang out with the lovely Cicely and Jay while I was up in L.A. Jay and Cicely are the type of people who have a bazillion friends but still manage to make time to hang out with you, so if they can take a night out for dinner and coffee than NOBODY has an excuse for flakiness. ;) Hehe. Thanks again guys for the delish adobo, but most of all for taking time to catch up.

Also, congratulations go out to Jennie and Brian for their beautiful little twin girls, Abigail and Sophia!!! We know Faith is going to be the coolest aunt around too.

I'm procrastinating right now. I don't have class until 7 and our apartment is a disaster zone, but I am taking time to check e-mail and blog instead of doing what I should be, which is cleaning. It's never fun to fold clothes and vacuum. Also, since we're moving I'm trying to go through the stuff we need to donate and that in itself is a monumental task. Oy vay.

Insomnia

2006-08-29T05:28:00.000-07:00

I know I've been MIA and you have all been waiting with baited breath for my latest and greatest post. Ha! Is there anyone even still reading this? These past two weeks have been hectic what with being in LA, and while I did come down to San Diego for the weekend I've been spending all of my time either apartment hunting or writing this huge ass paper that is due today. Kyle was starting to wonder if his wife even existed anymore. Thankfully, we have found an apartment and I am almost done with my paper, so there is a light at the end of the tunnel! I technically was going to wait to blog until my paper was done and turned in, as that is what I should be working on, but since I'm suffering from yet another bout of insomnia and it's the butt crack of dawn right now I figure now is probably not the best time to work on a paper. My blog probably won't even make much sense as it is, but here goes.

LA was a blast, I got to see and do most of the things I was hoping for. Although considering last week was the week before the Emmy's, the closest I came to seeing any celebrities/Emmy action was watching workers set up the tent for the post-Emmy party at the Pacific Design Center and driving past the Ivy, where I think I may have caught a brief glimpse of...wait for it...Byron Allen getting out of his car! Yes, THE Byron Allen! Somebody actually asked me, "Who is Byron Allen?", and I couldn't even remember what he was (semi) famous for. The only thing I could come up with was his cheesey interview show and I also think he played Alfonso's dad or uncle on Silver Spoons. Google him people. He's one of those obscure actors that probably only me or Nina know about.

Since I haven't blogged in so long, there are a few things I wanted to talk about regarding my time in lala land. So here are my blogs within my blog, my meta-blogs if you will:

Flakiness
Now, I'm not sure if this is an LA thing or not, but all I know is that I made multiple plans with people that were changed/moved around/cancelled at the last minute, and that doesn't seem to happen to me much in San Diego. Granted, I don't really know very many people in San Diego to make plans with, but still. I made a point to e-mail/contact the people who I really wanted to see weeks before I came out, and after receiving e-mail confirmations of dates and times I got the old, "Oh, I thought we were meeting NEXT week, not this week!" Grrr, come on peeps, how can you confuse the dates when we've been talking about this for weeks and weeks and we have the date going around in several different e-mails? I don't expect to be at the top of your list, but really, sometimes you've gotta wonder. I guess I'm just one of those people that likes to make plans and actually stick to them. Call me crazy.

Wardrobe Malfunctions
So, I was getting ready to go out for dinner and drinks with Kathy, Nina, and Cheryl for a good old Rowland reunion. I came across that ever present dillemma in a woman's life: what shoes do I wear? Do I wear my diva platform shoes with the cute little flowers printed on the heels or my fallback comfy casual yet cute black flip-flops with a bow? Remembering that I am a married woman that doesn't need to worry about impressing anyone with my shoes, I opted for the flip-flops. What can I say, I'm a comfort before beauty type of gal. Actually, I think the shoes would be more to impress other women since I am 99.99999% sure that straight guys probably do not check out what shoes girls wear. In fact, their line of sight probably doesn't make it further down than the calf of a woman's leg. Okay, so that's a gross overgeneralization, but I digress. Just what do you think happens to said flip-flops at the end of the night? Somehow, a tear developed in the straps of my flip-flops, causing them to come precariously close to falling apart. If not for the cute bow holding them together they would have been goners. I don't know what I would have done w/o my very favorite pair of shoes, but luckily the week prior I had spotted the exact same pair at Ross Dress for Less when I was home for the weekend. So where do you think the very first place I hit up was upon my return? You guessed it. My only hope was that they were still there. To my dismay, when I checked the place I last saw them they were gone, so I thought oh well, I'll go look for sunglasses. As I was perusing the accessories section, I caught a glimpse of a separate rack for flip-flops and lo and behold there were my coveted shoes! In my size! It was like divine intervention. The shoe goddesses were smiling down on me that day.

NKOTB
I stayed with Kathy and Greg for the majority of my time up in LA. For those of you who don't know Kathy, we go way back to junior high. I've known her for over half of my life. During our tween years, we were absolutely OBSESSED with New Kids on the Block. I can't even begin to describe to you the level of insanity we were at, but this story will give you an idea. While I was in LA, one of Kyle's co-workers, knowing what a big NKOTB fan I was, sent him an e-mail telling him to let me know that she heard that they were going to be having a reunion. Kyle, being the devoted and sweet husband he is, forwarded the e-mail to me much to his reluctance, which I proceeded to forward to Kathy, and upon her recipt of it she and I started going ballistic and regressing back to our teeny bopper years. Coincidentally, Kathy's mom had just moved and was getting rid of boxes out of her house, and Kathy told me that she was pretty sure one of the boxes held all of her NKOTB memorabilia from years gone by. Well after hearing that I just couldn't leave LA without going through that box, so you know we cracked open that box as soon as she told me about it. Sure enough, there were the gigantic buttons, concert programs, tapes (yes, tapes, not CDs) with NKOTB songs, and endless stacks of posters. The very best part? Kathy found old old mini magazines that we used to make for each other. We titled our magazine, "Teen, Bop, Beat Party" and we wrote fake articles about how Jordan had a girlfriend named Kathy and he is no longer a single man, pasted in posters of the New Kids with our own pictures skillfully doctored in using scissors and glue (hey, there was no Photoshop back then!), and I even made a fake subscription card to be filled out and returned. The best was I even wrote a birthday rap for Kathy in the vein of the NKOTB rapping style. How I had time for all of this, I don't know. Needless to say, Kathy and I were up half the night going through them and practically peeing our pants at the things we put in those "Teen, Bop, Beat Party" issues. I'm telling you, I missed my calling as a magazine editor. If you saw those magazines you would know what I'm talking about.

If you've lost all respect for me, I understand. I'm kind of wondering about myself at this point. Gotta go look up those reunion dates now.

Return to L.A.

2006-08-13T10:39:00.000-07:00

I'm going back to L.A. for a temporary two week stint at my old job. Should be interesting - I haven't been back in forever thanks to the crazy cost of gas. I'm looking forward to it though. Two weeks should be the perfect amount of time for me to try to get in and do the things I miss the most, like:

1. Eat a chinese chicken salad at California Chicken Cafe
2. Walk down Robertson Blvd. and join the papparazzi in staking out the Ivy for celeb sitings
3. Walk down to the Beverly Center and have bignettes at The Grand Luxe
4. Window shopping on Santa Monica Blvd.
5. Traipse down Main St. between Santa Monica and Venice enjoying the fresh ocean breeze and people sighting
6. More eating at: Minori Sushi, California Rock N' Roll Sushi (Hawaiian roll), any Indian or Korean BBQ restaurant
7. Visit the Farmer's Market and the Grove just for old times sake

I know most of the above involve eating, but I can't really justify spending on anything else since we are supposed to be saving money. I'm sure I won't make it to every place on the list, but it will be nice to visit my old haunts. Brings back fun memories of our times up in L.A. Too bad I'll be working during the day so I won't really get to see the beach or anything.

I'm sad I'll be apart from Kyle for so long though. :(

Issues

2006-08-10T19:52:00.000-07:00

vitriolic - adj. corrosive; sarcastic

I'm taking this class right now that's all about exploring your issues and feelings on things. I'm finding these are my major issues right now:

1. Avoidance of confrontation
2. Feeling rejected/loneliness
3. Thinking too much before speaking/not living "in the moment"
4. Middle child syndrome (goes into #2 - not feeling like I'm worthy)
5. Low confidence level
6. Uneasiness with public speaking/large groups

I don't know if it's right for me to categorize those things, but there you have it. I think the hardest part for me is that we are discussing everything in a large group of 23 people, so for me to try to deal with #s 1-5 while simulataneously feeling uncomfortable talking in front of so many people is really hard. Plus, usually I deal with things through my vitriolic sense of humor, but it seems that is not the healthiest way to go about things.

I think the underlying issue for me right now is my fear of rejection and loneliness. I've thought about it a lot since moving to San Diego. A lot of my friends are not down here, and I'm not the type of person who makes friends easily. I thought it would be easier once I got back to school, but I'm feeling like I'm looked at as an older person that others wouldn't want to hang out with outside of class. Even though I'm only a few years older than most of the other students, I probably have this stigma to me that I'm just a married lady who doesn't like to have fun. I don't really look at people by their age, but I get self conscious that that is how I am seen. Some of my best friends are the same age as the people in my class, but I've never really thought about their age.

It seems we all have a tendency to put people in a box and label them. I know I'm guilty of it from time to time, but I really think I've done a pretty good job of really trying to get to know people for who they are and not basing my assessment of them on pre-conceived notions based on how they look, their age, their marital status, etc. I think the human mind works in a way that we need to categorize in order to make sense of the world, but if everyone could just try to break that tendency and open up, I think the world would be a better place. Again, I am not saying I am free of bias, and I probably never will be. I feel that it's healthy to acknowledge that we have biases, and at least try to be self aware of what they are so that you can work on them. It bothers me when people think they are just soooo open minded and everyone else is so ignorant. I feel lucky to have been exposed to so many different people in my life and to have had training that has allowed me to open up my mind. I can't blame people who have not been as fortunate as I have been. Guess I'm just a fortunate fool.

I am an Aunt!

2006-08-02T22:08:00.000-07:00

Today was a crazy emotional day. My parents and I went with my sister to see the sonogram that would show the sex of her baby. I won't disclose the sex here, since Cathee probably would like to be able to tell people herself insteaed of having me post it on my blog for all to read, but I just have to say how amazing it is to sit in a room and see your future niece/nephew (ha, thought you had me there, huh?) just kickin' it, waiting to be born. He/she waved his/her little arm and started moving his/her mouth, like he/she was talking, and we joked that there was probably a cell phone in there since my sister is notorious for her marathon cell phone talks. Mom started crying (of course), and dad acted like he didn't care when I could really tell inside he was just swelling with pride. And Mike and Cathee are sooo ecstatic -how exciting!

It just made me realize, that despite any differences I may have with my sister, we are and always will be family, and that little kid is sure going to be loved to death by his/her aunt. Hopefully this blog will stand the test of time and one day my little niece/nephew will get to read how loved he/she was even before he/she was born. Whew, I'm getting exhausted now just trying to make sure I'm covering my bases with the gender thing. Anyway, just had to share with you just how awesome it was.

Drunk Dialing

2006-07-29T22:41:00.000-07:00

I got drunk last night and was drunk dialing people at random. So if I left a message or spoke to you, please let me know what I said. It's all a blur. I think I have a hilarious alternate personality when I'm drunk, but am curious to know if it's just all in my head - kind of like beer goggles, except I suppose in this case it would be personality goggles.

I'm getting too old for this shizz. I think I need to lay off the drinking. Every time I do it now I feel like I've gained 20 lbs. And then I can never get anything accomplished the next day. Add that to the fact that I seriously think I have killed a million brain cells via alcohol - if that isn't a clear cut message to quit I don't know what is. I feel like I was so much smarter in college than I am now. Thinking just seems to take so much more effort nowadays than it did back then. I am much less Owl and much more Eeyore these days. More Hagrid than Hermione. More Joey than Ross. Anyway, you get the picture.

Ode to Craig(slist)

2006-07-27T19:18:00.000-07:00

Dear Craig,

I really enjoy checking out your list every day. I don't know what it is, but sometimes I just can't stop thinking about all the amazing things you have to offer. I know it is wrong for me to think about any man other than Kyle's anything, but when you can find a home, a job, a partner, furniture, a pet, and a free giant cactus all in one place - I mean, what more could a person ask for?

The one good thing about having to move is that I actually have a reason to look at your website. Usually I just maniacally click on it throughout the day without rhyme or reason. I'm obsessed with finding out what the latest is in the world of craigslist san diego. Maybe you should slap a restraining order on me or something. But the thing is, even if I'm in jail, I will find you. Mmmwwahahaha.

By the way, did that guy who saw the cute girl wearing a UCSD sweatshirt buy a slurpee and drive away in a Black Volkswagon Jetta at the 7-11 on Gold Coast & Camino Ruiz ever hook up with his missed connection?

With Love and Devotion,
Cheryl

The End of an Era

2006-07-21T08:03:00.000-07:00

extirpate - v. to destroy, exterminate, cut out

Today is officially my last day as a full-time advertising employee. It's really surreal to think that I won't be doing the same thing I have been doing day in and day out for the past 7+ years. Will I miss it? I'm sure there are parts of it I definitely will (particularly the aforementioned perks). And then there are the things I definitely won't miss. Every time I leave a job I tend to only remember the good things about it, but this isn't just leaving a job, it's leaving a career. Pretty scary/exciting stuff. Hopefully advertising will always be there as a fallback for me and I won't be completely extirpated from it.

Anyway, just some boring thoughts for my last day. In other career news, Kyle is switching departments at his job. Congratulations Kyle! Sometimes he worries that people judge him as a person by his career. Most of our friends have philanthropic, non-corporate type of jobs. It's great because we share that common concern for others, which is probably why we are friends, but I sort of see what Kyle means because I was that person that worked in corporate America for a long time. For whatever reason, people seem to think that what you do for al iving is a direct reflection of who you are as a person. Yes, sometimes it does reflect our interests, but just because Kyle works in finance doesn't mean that he is a greedy money whore. If Kyle could have survived his whole life working for non-profits, he would have done it, but unfortunately non-profit salaries don't quite cover your entire cost of living when you have student loan debt and car payments to worry about. Those of my friends who are lucky enough to have had their entire education paid for by their parents and received cars as graduation/birthday presents were more readily able to choose their jobs without having to take salary into consideration. I guess our goal one day would be to allow our kids to do the same. Ironically, I actually won't be making a huge amount less as a school counselor than I am in advertising. In fact, if I had been in school counseling for 7 years vs. media buying for 7 years I have a feeling I would actually be making more than I currently am making.

Sorry to be so boring today, Kyle and I downed a whole bottle of wine last night on our own and so I'm not quite feeling up to blogging par today.

Coffee Junkie

2006-07-17T08:43:00.000-07:00

desuetude - n. cessation of use

HAPPY 2 YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO ME & KYLE! Here's to spending the two best years of my life con mi persona favorita en todo del mundo.

I've been having trouble sleeping lately, so have been completely relying on coffee to get me through my days. I usually only have one cup a day, which I suppose is not too bad, but I would rather rely on my own energy sources than to be dependent on the Bucks (Starbucks that is). First of all, it's way too expensive a habit to have. I've been pretty good lately about only drinking coffee at home or at the office, but the occassional Starbucks stop really adds up. When I first started working, me and my co-workers used to go to the Bucks at least two times a day. How I managed to do that on a $26,000 a year salary, I'll never know. But think of the cost:

An average $3.50 per cup of coffee
x 2 times a day
x 5 work days a week
x 52 work weeks
= $1,820 per year

Yikes! I could have invested that money into a 401k or a Roth IRA (yes Kyle, I do sometimes pay attention to your finance talk). Had I done so,I would have been a few thou richer by now. I actually went through a good period where I practiced desuetude from coffee, although my reputation as a coffee addict precedes me. Probably because my friends know how excited I can get at the prospect of a tall coffee Frappuccino on a hot summer day, or during the winter months, a tall non-fat white mocha. Somehow I can never escape the stigma of being coffee reliant. I guess when I do fall off the caffeine wagon, I go big or go home!

On a completely unrelated note, I have a confession to make. That new Paris Hilton song, Stars are Blind? Yeah, I kind of like it. I was driving along in my car the other day, minding my own business, when that song came on I actually turned up the volume much to my horror and dismay. It was like my hand had a mind of it's own, even though my brain was willing it to stop before I touched the volume dial. And to make matters worse, I turned it up AGAIN! Two times! And the second time was even worse because at least the first time I barely realized what I was doing. **shudder**

If I ever start putting extensions in my hair and incorporating "That's hot" into every other sentence, somebody slap me.

A Student Again

2006-07-12T20:48:00.000-07:00

I started school on Monday. It's the strangest thing to take an 8 year break from something and then have to step right back into it. I guess you could say going back to school is like riding a bike though, because everything just seemed to come rushing back to me at once. Okay, so my concerns about the laptop thing were totally unnecessary. In fact, you'd probably look like a right ass if you whipped out a laptop during heavy discussion sessions, so I'm really glad I didn't run out and buy one. And make no mistake about it, I seriously considered buying one. Luckily I kept those thoughts a secret from Kyle or he probably would have had a heart attack, what with his high cholesterol and all.

The one thing I did have to get used to again was raising my hand in class. There were a few times I just blurted things out, and I don't think it went over very well. Oh well, ya live and learn. My first night I had 60 pages of reading. 60 PAGES! I think that's more non-fiction than I've read ever since I graduated from undergrad! It went quickly though, because now I feel like this is information I'm actually going to apply to my real life career. Imagine that! Anyway, I like it so far.

I'll try to keep up the blogging, but my posts may be sparse in the next few weeks since I'm still working full-time in addition to taking my class, and Kyle and I are celebrating our two-year anniversary on Monday. How he has survived two years of waking up to my scary Clearasil spotted, messy ponytail, crazy-thick glasses wearing face every morning I'll never know. God love him.

A Vagrant's Life

2006-07-06T16:22:00.000-07:00

peripatetic - adj. wandering

Kyle and I have decided that we will need to move once our lease is up in October. We love our place now, but we just won't be able to afford it once I go back to school full-time. That will make wherever we live next the 7th place, 4th city, and 2nd county we've lived in less than 4 years. I am a constantly peripatetic soul.

It's funny too, because I was a Navy brat growing up and HATED moving. I seriously loathed it. I would leave little random notes around my parents' bedroom protesting impending moves, hoping that somehow this method would impel them to change their mind and decide not to uproot my life for yet another move. In the end, I suppose one could say that it helped me to build resilience to change over time. However, I also think it may have damaged me socially. To the point where I could never maintain any friendships because by the time I got into the being invited to sleep over stage I would be off to the next city and a new life.

Right before we got married, we experienced a variety of events that convinced us to move from L.A. to San Diegoo, including slashed tires on both of our cars, me working 100+ hour workweeks and coming home crying, and the ultimate deciding factor being the flood in our apartment building that destroyed our unit. It was then that we decided that God was sending us a message to jump ship. Much like he did with Noah and the great flood. Okay, maybe it was way different, but you get what I'm saying.

Also, right before we got married, we thought San Diego would be a great place for us to settle down and start a family, particularly since my whole family had migrated down here. There are many things I love about San Diego - the weather, the way that traffic is a billionth less crazy than what it was in L.A., and of course being close to my family is nice. But before I moved, I remember talking to some of my friends who had moved from San Diego to L.A. and I recalled them saying that everyone in San Diego is very much about SAN DIEGO. I didn't quite get what they meant at the time, but boy, now I really understand. Not only are San Diegans proud to be from here, many of them HATE L.A. and everything that comes from it. Unfortunately, I come from L.A. Really, I don't think there is anything wrong with being proud of where you are from. But what's funny is when I hear people say that the reason San Diegans don't like L.A. is because people from L.A. think that San Diego is just an extension of L.A. Um, I totally never thought that! I always thought that San Diego was a distinctly different place from L.A., and even Orange County is a completely different place in between. I just think there is no need for all of this hatred in the world. This type of San Diego-centricism if you will is almost akin to the egocentric attitude of Americans who think there is no other country but America. Let's just all get along people.

Back to School Preparations

2006-06-21T16:30:00.000-07:00

Did Kevin from Kevin & Bean get a divorce? I'm listening to the stream from this morning and they were talking about how Kevin isn't happy that Miami won the NBA finals (boo!). Bean said it was just because Shaq was in the Lakers during Kevin's divorce, so he has bad associations with the big guy. Kevin insists it's because he just can't stand the idea of Shaq being happy that he has gotten back at the Lakers. I'm kind of on board with Kevin myself. Then again, I don't think I am ever happy if anyone other than the Lakers wins.

So school starts for me in a few weeks. Seeing as how it has been almost 10 years since I last attended a class, I imagine things have changed quite a bit. Will I look like a dork the first day of class when I show up with notebook and pencil in hand while everyone else busts out their state of the art laptops? Do I bring a backpack to class, or am I supposed to have moved on to a sophisticated leather briefcase as a grad student? I remember when all I had to worry about when it came to back to school was buying new clothes. Now I have to do the opposite and try my hardest NOT to buy new clothes since I will be one broke ass student. At least now I've grown up enough to know that while that free t-shirt with the Mastercard logo splattered across it is utterly cool and will probably show up in the latest issue of In Style magazine, it is not worth an eternity of credit card bills.

I guess there are good and bad things about going back to school. I'll probably have a better idea of what those things are once I actually start. Wish me luck!

Happy Faces

2006-06-15T15:44:00.000-07:00

feckless - adj. worthless; weak; ineffective

So yesterday I was listening to the John Tesh radio evening show (an unfortunate side effect of my newfound love for Celine Dion type music). John was actually talking about an interesting study that was just conducted on the effectiveness of writing requests to people on post-it notes. Apparantly, the study proved that people are much more likely to fulfill requests that are written to them on a post-it note because it feels more personal. The likelihood of the request being filled increases even more when a happy face is written on the post-it, as it appeals to people's good nature. I've decided now that I'm going to carry post-it notes around in my purse, to be handed out in appropriate situations such as the following:

When I run into Katie Holmes (since it happens quite often of course):
"Please come to your senses and get out of that Cruiseazy situation you are in, fake baby and all. :)"

To the rude restaurant hostess:
"Please do not look down at me just because you control the seating in this fine establishment. Being unpleasant is not going to get your promoted to waitress any faster. :)"

At the grocery store:
"Please position your cart so it is not blocking the entire aisle, causing a traffic jam while you look for just the right salad dressing with the perfect number of calories and fat content. :)"

At family parties:
"Please stop asking me when we are going to have kids. :)" (I'll just have to wear this one, since I'd run out of post-it notes in no time if I had to give one to every person who asks)

To the Passive Agressives:
"Be straightforward! If you think you are better than me just say so, you are entitled to your opinion. :)"

And finally, for Kyle's dentist:
"You suck. :)" - All right, I know that isn't a request, but really a post-it note or anything for that matter would probably be feckless against the extortionists in the dental industry (not including my friend Chris of course)

Meditation

2006-06-13T14:16:00.000-07:00

aspersion - n., slander

Thanks to those of you who expressed concern after my bitching posts yesterday. After my yoga session today, I feel much much better. Sometimes you just need to center yourself and just breathe. I highly recommend yoga for anyone who needs to just relax. If I am lucky enough to be an expectant mother someday, I already know I will want to take maternity yoga (is that what it's called?). Just knowing how to breathe can make such a difference. Do I sound granola or what?

Anyway, hopefully nobody accuses me of aspersion from yesterday's post. I tried keeping names anonymous, etc. out of respect. If anyone wants to start a blog and write about any of my inappropriate behavior in it, be my guest!

This week is a pretty busy one for me. I have something to do every single night. Very unusual. Kyle's sister, Jenny, is in town with her friend. I'm looking forward to some girl time tonight. Normally I would take them somewhere for dinner, but seeing as how I will soon be a starving student it's a nice home cooked meal instead. Wednesday & Thursday I have work related activities, then Friday I'll be hanging out with Sarah helping her prepare for little Wyatt's first birthday party on Saturday. Congratulations to Wyatt for taking his first steps yesterday!

Oh yeah, the other thing that cheered me up is listening to ALO's CD. Just hearing it gives me warm fuzzies inside.

Ranting Continued

2006-06-12T20:55:00.000-07:00

Is it better to be an overly confident asshole or a humble person who sincerely cares about other people? I think society tells us to try to be the former rather than the latter. Not that I think confidence and caring cannot occur simultaneously, but sometimes I just think that those who pretend they are the be all and end all are revered in this world. Does it matter that their entire self worth is based on how much better they consider themselves to be than everyone else? I may not be the world's most confident person, but for the most part I derive happiness in the fact that I consider my finest quality to be my capacity for compassion rather than my ability to bullshit my way into or out of any situation.

I'd like to say at 30 I'm an entirely self assured person, but that would be an untruth. What I can say about myself is that I care a lot about my family, my friends, and humankind in general. I am happy with the intelligence level I possess. Even though this post is on the judge-y side, I try my hardest not to constantly critique and judge everyone around me. I'd say I've done a decent job at being an accepting person overall. The major exception to my acceptance is when I feel like someone is not willing to be accepting of me. Sure, I know I shouldn't apply "rules" to my acceptance level, but for some reason or other I can't help but feel like people who don't accept me don't necessarily earn my 100% acceptance in return. I'm working on being more open minded in that regard. Perhaps it's something that will evolve over time. Hey, nobody's perfect, least of all me.

I promised myself that I was going to try to make my blog a place where I could be more positive overall, but you know, I guess I can't pretend to be positive all the time. Sometimes you need a bad day to get your thoughts cleared. There's always tomorrow...

Passive Agressive or Overly Sensitive?

2006-06-12T16:52:00.000-07:00

You know what drives me crazy? When people try to get all passive agressive on your ass. I don't know if I'm being overly sensitive or what (entirely possible), but it just seems to me that I have recently been over-exposed to passive agressive behavior indirectly targeted at me. Why do people feel the need to sneakily attempt to make you feel like crap? The worst part is that passive agressive behavior by it's very nature is a way for someone to hide their insults to you in a way that doesn't SEEM like they are insulting you, so they inevitably cannot be proven to be the bad guy, and if you try to approach them about it they make you seem like you are crazy. I don't know, if anyone is out there reading this, please tell me if you think the below comments are passive agressive insults (names of the accused passive agressivers, heretofore known as PA's, are being withheld out of respect in case comments have been misinterpreted by overly sensitive blogger):

Scenario #1: Discussing a new home purchase of a relative of PA.

PA: As soon as I saw this home I knew it was perfect for him/her. It is just so beautiful!
Me: Yeah, I love it! The kitchen is awesome, and it is the perfect set up for him/her.
PA: Mmmhmm...so tell me again, are you still RENTING (change in intonation at the mention of RENTING).
Me: Oh, yeah (mumbling something about going back to school, can't afford to buy, etc.)

Scenario #2: Discussing pregnancy of PA.

PA: I'm growing out of my clothes, so do you think I could borrow some of your old clothes to use as maternity wear?
Me: I don't think it's very nice to ask someone to use their clothes as maternity wear.
PA: Well, if I was a size 8 and someone else I knew was a size 2, I wouldn't mind it if they asked me for their clothes.
Me: Oh. (I'm not a size 8)

It's really hard to convey this type of behavior if you aren't actually there, but it could also be the result of me feeling sensitive about things like money or my weight. Particularly since I just found out I have a medical condition that makes it difficult for me to break down certain types of food in my body, so my weight can fluctuate quite a bit if I'm not careful. Anyway, Kyle thinks I'm crazy half the time because I think about these things too much. Good thing I have a blog to vent on.

Sorry to be Negative Nelly today, it's been a particularly rough day. I'll try to post happy thoughts again soon.

Taking the Plunge Part Two!

2006-06-06T15:09:00.000-07:00

intransigent - adj., uncompromising

Well folks, it's official. I gave my notice yesterday and am now on my way to a new career in school counseling. It's kind of surreal to think that I will no longer be a part of the crazy world of advertising. Oh advertising, parting is such sweet sorrow. No longer will I have the pleasure of taking advantage of fun perks like concert tickets and American Idol tapings, nor will I likely ever be taken to a free dinner at Morton's or the Ivy or Spago. Poor me, I will have to pay for my own meals from hereon forward. What I won't miss: last minute changes, crazy hours (more so in L.A. than here), unreasonable clients (who shall remain nameless).

Every job has it's disadvantages. I am by no means going into this new career thinking that everything will be perfect. But I am excited to be working at something that I am really passionate about. Every kid in this world deserves to have the same chances in life as the next child. If I can help level the playing field as a school counselor, I will be overjoyed. I can never understand people who think they are fundamentally better than other people just by being born. Really, that's what racism, sexism, classism, and pretty much any other ism you can think of is about. We all have this need to feel like we are better than other people. I'm not saying I'm completely innocent of it myself, but I am at my happiest when I am not trying to impress other people, and I'm just happy with being me.

"Perfect" is such a relative term anyway. What's perfect to one person is not necessarily perfect to the next. If we are all striving towards this one idea of "perfection" just so we can feel like people look at us and say, "Wow, that person is perfect in every way", well, I've got news for you honey. No matter who you are or what you do, there is going to be somebody out there that will talk shit about you. One of the most accurate cliches is "You can't please all the people all of the time." I used to want to do that, and I practically drove myself crazy doing so. Now I am just happy if my family and friends can accept me for who I am, because I certainly try to accept and love them in an intransigent, unconditional way.

Anyway, sorry to get on my pedestal just now. I've had a lot on my mind and needed to get a little out. I am really excited to go back to school though. Starting over at 30 won't be easy, but I'm going to do my best. Luckily I've got the world's greatest husband to help me through. :)

The San Diego Reader

2006-06-01T14:52:00.000-07:00

agog - adj. eager, excited

Now that we've come to the end of new primetime programming, I've taken up reading to pass the time. Nothing too heavy, I must ease back into it seeing as how it's been a good couple of months since I've picked up a book. Kyle is a voracious reader. He burns through about 100 books a month. Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating, but it seems like he is always reading several different books at one time. I, on the otherhand, am agog if I read one book in a month. There was one girl I used to work with who said she hasn't read a book in something crazy, like 5 years. Reading is a sadly underutilized and overlooked form of entertainment in our society. Even when I don't like a book, I enjoy passing the time just reading. Case in point, the book I am reading right now was very kindly loaned to me from an acquaintance. It's a fluffy chick book, which normally I am all about, but for some reason this book just doesn't do it for me. The characters aren't too likeable, the plot is kind of all over the place, but you know what? I still read it just to find out what happens in the end. I'm trying to pick out the good things in it instead of focusing on the bad. I'm the eternal reading optimist, hoping that somehow the ending will redeem the entire week I have invested into this so-so story. After all, the opportunity cost for reading this novel equates to some juicy Laguna Beach repeats so it better be worth it!

Trippin'

2006-05-30T16:43:00.000-07:00

insularity - adj. narrow mindedness, isolated

So how do you like my new blog template? I think the dots are cute. I was getting tired of the plain grey. Why is grey/gray spelled two different ways? That's always confused me. Also, I think you can spell cancelation with one l or two. I've always been a stickler for spelling - probably harks all the way back to the hours of preparation I endured for my 3rd grade spelling bee. I ended up spelling "kindergarten" wrong (with a d instead of a t). But really, did placing 3rd in the spelling bee end up helping me to be a more successful career woman in the long run? I know people who can't spell for the life of them, but thanks to the modern day miracles of spell check they are making tons more money than I ever will.

Memorial Day weekend was the bomb dot com man! Kyle and I have been guilty of insularity within a 10 mile radius of our apartment ever since we moved to San Diego, so we are really clueless when it comes to all the fun things to do in San Diego. So this weekend I busted out my nerdy tourist book, the San Diegan, and we took advantage of the glorious weather and the fact that everyone and their mother was visiting San Diego for the long weekend, and we ended up traipsing around all over the county from downtown to Carlsbad, Old Town to Temecula. It was really fun! We got to see Jay and Cicely on Saturday AND Sunday, so they were probably so glad to get back to L.A. and get rid of us, but we wanted to spend as much time as possible with them considering they got ENGAGED!!! Yep, they made Kyle and I feel like big a-holes because we went to meet them at their hotel, and they totally didn't even tell us right away. After about 30 minutes, Cicely practically had to shove the ring in my face until I realized what was going on. You would think I would've caught on considering the fact that Jay had a big vase full of flowers with him and he was acting really funny. Anyway, I am so happy for them and can't wait to initiate them into the old married people club (but don't worry guys, I'll ALWAYS be older than you!).

Also got to hang out with Kristine. Kristine is so fun, always makes me smile when I get to see her. Found out that she reads the same reality show blogs as I do. I love how she is not afraid to confess her nerd like (aka Cheryl-like) tendencies to me. Although I probably just transmitted my nerd-itis on to her through repeat exposure.

Ahhh, I love 3-day weekends.

Reductus Brain Cells

2006-05-24T15:41:00.000-07:00

I told Kyle this morning that I think I have some sort of mental disorder that causes me to forget entire conversations I have with people. Seriously, it's very scary, plus it makes it hard to be a good friend when you make plans that you never remember. My dad calls it CRS (Can't Remember Shit) when he refers to my mom, which is very un-PC considering her medical history, and I wouldn't even find it mildly amusing were it not for the fact that my mom herself thinks it is the most hilarious thing she's ever heard. That plus the fact that my dad CGS (Couldn't Give a Shit) about being PC. This, after all, is the man who not only leaves his cell phone on while watching a movie in a theater full of people, but he straight answers it and has a full on lengthy conversation with the person on the other end of the phone in his normal talking voice. Ah, dad, gotta love him!

I used to think I was a good listener, but now one of two things has happened. Either a) Somewhere in my old age and hermit like state I have lost my listening skills, or b) I'm just plain losing it. I almost prefer the latter since option a) makes me out to be a lazy person. Actually, more like a lazy friend. I know I'm lazy in many aspects given the fact that 99.99% of my life outside of work is spent watching TV on the recliner couch, but I've always taken some sort of pride in considering myself a good friend who is willing to go above and beyond for those I love.

So to my friends who are always patiently enduring my constant brain farts, I say thank you.

Oh, one thing I have not forgotten is my vocab words, but having to look up vocab words for every post is discouraging me from blogging when I feel like it, so I'll have to make it an occassional thing. I guess I am just a CRS riddled lazy ass.

Random Friday Thoughts

2006-05-19T15:09:00.000-07:00

Can I just tell you how much I heart Rachael Ray? She is just so amazing with her user friendly recipes and effervescent personality. I know some people find her annoying, but the fact that she has probably made me a much better cook than I used to be is reason enough to make her good in my book 4 eva. I totally want her job too. I can't imagine anything better than getting paid to eat and travel.

Remember slam books? Those were so fun. I'm sure there is an online version somewhere. If anyone finds one, let me know.

I have a major dilemma next Wednesday. The American Idol finale vs. the Lost finale. I know I will have to watch Lost out of default because that's what Kyle will want to see on the big TV. Not that I'm complaining, but since we don't have Tivo or DVR and we don't know how to operate our VCR, I won't be able to see any of the AI finale. I probably won't even get to see the important part where they reveal who wins, since the Lost finale is supposed to be the best thing ever aired on TV, and I'm sure we'll be on the edge of our seats until the very last minute. Oh, what to do, what to do? Curse you ABC & Fox for putting me at such a crossroads!

You know how people say you should put thoughts of work in an imaginary "box" when you go home so your professional life doesn't intrude on your personal life? I am so not good at doing that. Lately work has even encroached into my dreams. One of our clients is a hotel downtown, and last night I dreamt I was staying there to do research on downtown. Oh, and I've been waking up at 2:30am like clockwork every night and having trouble going back to sleep. I really think I've got some anxiety issues going on. Somebody get me Dr. Phil's number!

I am so glad I am not in the dating world anymore, because I cannot stand cologne. There is only one kind that I actually sort of like, which I got a bottle of for Kyle, but even that cologne I can only take in small doses. Have you ever been in a room with someone who wears entirely too much cologne? The other week I was in a meeting with someone who positively reeked of the stank stuff, and I was sure that I was going to pass out at any moment. Luckily I escaped just in time. Seriously man, how can anyone pour that stuff on themselves and think themselves sexy to the opposite gender (or same gender, whatever the case may be)? That's why I just don't buy those Axe commercials. Sure it's a deodarant, not cologne, but I just prefer the smell of nothing to that of musk. Gag.

The CW

2006-05-18T16:47:00.000-07:00

proclivity - n. inclination

Today I went to a station event where they were broadcasting the upfront presentation for the new CW network (WB/UPN network merge) in New York. Even though I work in a fairly laid back industry, there is still that business element to it that every now and then makes me feel completely out of place. Case in point, one of the network big wigs was talking about how they are trying to target the Adults 18-34 demographic (I'm still in the demographic, yay!). To introduce the new programming for this demo, the ads showcasing their primetime line up will feature a song by the Black Eyed Peas. Here's where it got interesting:

Stuffy Network Suit: "And now ladies and gentlemen, the Black Eyed Peas!"

Spattering of applause throughout the audience. Out comes Fergie in her signature jump suit and over the top gold glitter
eyeshadow. Apl d sporting his dreads and sunglasses inside. They start singing. Fergie strips off her sweatshirt to
reveal her tiny black sports bra. More singing. Silence from the audience.

I mean, how weird would it be to be this huge musical group, used to performing in front of hoards of adoring fans, and there you are gyrating and doing back flips in front of a stoic, expressionless audience? I have a natural proclivity towards that type of music, so I would have been completely excited to be there. But I had to hold back my excitement, since everyone around me watching the broadcast just didn't seem to get it. I felt awkward for the BEP even from way across the other side of the country.

The best part of the upfront was when Chris Rock came out and told everyone they should start spending money on the CW because the role of young Chris in "Everybody Hates Chris" is now going to be played by a white girl. He went on and on about how there are going to be plenty of white people on the network, even random ones that will pop up every now and then and just be like, "Hey, I'm white!". And he ended it by saying "Now you all better spend some motherfucking money!" Coming from Chris Rock in the middle of such a stuffy presentation...it was just priceless. Hilarious.

Red Lobster for the Sea World Lover in You

2006-05-17T14:38:00.000-07:00

impecunious – adj., having little or no money

For Mother’s Day, Kyle and I went to Sea World with my mom and dad. Before we left, I sparingly lathered on some sun block over my body and face. Call me a bad wife, but I neglected to tell Kyle to do the same. I think I had thought about it, but then figured eh, he doesn’t usually like to put on sun block anyway. Our friend Craig who lives on a boat NEVER wears sunscreen, and inevitably at the end of a sunny day he looks like he is wearing full on makeup. I’m talking blush, lipstick, the whole nine yards.

So of course by the end of our trip to Sea World I had sunburn splotches randomly in areas where I did not cover, and Kyle had a lovely raccoon face burn. Seriously, for all the times in our lives when we get sunburn, do we never learn? I’m going out today to buy a tube of sunblock to carry in my purse. I call Kyle my lobster. I love that episode of “Friends”. “He’s her lobster!”

Well, I haven’t posted in a while so I’ve gathered up some random thoughts over the past week that I’ll bestow upon you now.

Cell Phone Calling

You know how you can tell when you call people on their cell phones if the call is going through or if their cell phone is off? If it’s off, you go straight to voice mail, but if it’s on and they just aren’t answering, it rings and rings. I know you’re there damnit! The only exception (I think) being when they don’t have reception. Lately I feel like I’m the person that calls but nobody wants to pick up. I called 5 people in a row recently and each time it rang until I went to voice mail. I started developing a complex about it. It seems like we’ve become a society that is becoming increasingly dependent on e-mail to keep in touch. The problem with e-mail is that, if you’re like me, messages tend to get buried in my in-box in between e-mails from travelocity telling me about the great deal on a European vacation that I'll never be able to afford and the paranoid chain letter e-mails about bad luck that I never forward. In between those e-mails somewhere is an actual message from a friend, and eventually I forget if I’ve responded to them or not. So I end up being that bad friend that doesn’t e-mail back. That must be why nobody takes my phone calls! I have to admit though, I've also become very reliant on corresponding with people via e-mail. I think I'm lacking in conversational skills as a result. I hardly ever call people just to talk now - I only have conversations to make plans. Anyway, kudos to the handful of you who always seem to pick up your phone when I call no matter what. To Kyle (you’d better!), Sarah, Jay, Angie, and MaryAnn – you make me feel special. :)

Eating Out

Lately Kyle and I have been trying to avoid becoming impecunious, so we’ve cut back dramatically on our eating out sessions. So now when we do eat out, I try to make the most of it and order something I’m really going to like. The problem with that is, now I’m also trying to eat healthier after last week’s drinking/greasy food binge. Last night we went to Baja Fresh. I ordered a mahi-mahi salad, but I didn’t realize that the dressing it comes with is an avocado pico dressing. I’m allergic to avocados. Not a develop a puffy face type and break out into hives allergic but the type of allergic that can cause you to go through 2 rolls of Charmin in one night. Maybe it’s not really an allergy, but whatever, that’s what I call it. Instead of using the dressing, I doused my salad with the spicy salsa they have. Not a good idea. It didn’t make it taste any better. The whole time we were eating I was staring at Kyle’s Chicken Ultimo Burrito with envy. I need to figure out where my line is between being able to enjoy good food but not gaining a million pounds to do so. It might be time to break out the Weight Watchers journal again.

I have more thoughts somewhere in my little brain, but it’s the middle of the day on a Wednesday and I’m getting too tired to pull them out. I’ll try writing more later.

Drinkin' the Blues Away

2006-05-09T14:52:00.000-07:00

perspicacity - n. acuteness of discernment or perception

Ohhh, what a painful loss. We were so so close, only to see the Lakers fade away into a crushing defeat by the Suns. Saturday night was rough. I couldn't even bring myself to talk about it until today.

Good thing we took Justin downtown to watch the game and go bar hopping. I think I would have just shut myself up in my room and cried all night long otherwise. It was the first time I actually got to explore downtown San Diego practically since I moved here. Funny, I used to go all the time when I lived in OC/L.A., but that was back when I was still a young buck. Now it takes me days to get over a full night of drinking.

A rundown of our stops:

5:30-7:30: The Whiskey Girl. The sad part is that we had an awesome table right in front of the big screen TV, so there was no way to not see the Lakers missing what seemed like every one of their baskets. I know, I know, I need to get over it! The bar was pretty cool - definitely a great place to watch sports since they had a gazillion TVs everywhere.

7:30-8:30: The Field. I loved this pub! I totally felt like I had been transported to Ireland. Justin described it as being very "real", to which I replied, "yeah, like Disneyland!". Cuz Disneyland is oh so real. I think the Disneyland comparison came more from the fact that it was kind of dim and cool, sort of Pirates of the Caribbean-esque. The food was nice and greasy, just how I like it.

8:45-9:15: Dick's Last Resort. I had always wanted to see what this place was like. It looks huge from the outside. For some reason we had to walk around in circles for a while before we found it. Once we got there, we were harrassed and yelled at as soon as we walked in by this girl selling Miller Lite and Bud at a booth at the front entrance. No thank you! I am just not a Miller/Bud kind of girl. Not that there's anything wrong with it, but if I'm gonna pay 5 bucks for a beer it better be an Amstel Lite. The crowd was...um, interesting to say the least. It was fun if you like having everything from straws and napkins thrown at you from all directions.

9:15-9:20: Tivoli's. Very young, college kiddy type of place. Basically I went in, took a tinkle, and then we decided we were over it already. It didn't seem awful, but it just wasn't the type of place for an old lady like me. I refuse to hang out with a crowd of people who were born mostly in the 80's - the mid-80's no less! Yes, I am an ageist! Really, I just think when I'm drinking that I don't want to be thinking about how most of these kids probably don't even remember the Cosby Show.

On the way to the next place we ran into a guy named Keith who was displaced here from New Orleans. He had lost his home and seen the devastation of Hurricane Katrina firsthand. We talked about that and the Lakers. Needless to say, that was a pretty sobering encounter and helped me to see that a Lakers loss is definitely not the worst thing to happen in the world.

9:20-10: Dussinni's. This was our last stop. Total high end business professional kind of place. Surprisingly not too expensive. By this time I was fading out, so I only had about 1/4 of my beer.

Thanks to Kyle for being a responsible DD and maintaining his perspicacity! Overall it was a fun night, but I feel pretty gross still from all the fattening food and gallons of beer I consumed. I'm glad we don't get out of town visitors too often or else I'd be one big mama.

Lakers 2007 baby! (I had to throw that one in for good measure)

So sad

2006-05-05T08:38:00.000-07:00

maladroit - adj. tactless, clumsy

Boo, what a difference a week makes. I thought by this time I'd be celebrating the glorious victory of the Lakers and an exciting L.A. Clippers/Lakers series, but now it's looking verrry iffy for my boys. The saddest part is that I saw some statistic saying that 96% of teams that go 3-1 in a series eventually go on to win. I really really hope the Lakers don't fall into that 4% category. I can't take the suspense!

I've been lagging on the posts this week. Work's been somewhat busy, and I've actually had things to do after work. Monday we went to see the John Butler Trio and Wednesday we saw Animal Liberation Orchestra. Both performances were on a Hornblower cruise ship, so it was fun to be able to enjoy the music while cruising around the San Diego Bay. Both were really amazing too! Kyle and I were dorky ALO groupies and went to talk to the band afterwards. I was pretty wasted at that point, so I don't even know what I was saying to the guitar player, Dan. When I play it back in my mind it goes something like this:

ME: So, where did you guys all meet?
DAN: We went to UC Santa Barbara together.
ME: That's cool, is that how you know Jack Johnson?
DAN: Yeah.
ME: Do you all live close to each other?
DAN: Well some of us live in San Francisco, one guy lives in Seattle.

But here's how it probably really went:

ME: OH MY GAWD! YOU GUYS ARE SOOO WICKED AWESOME!
DAN: Uh, thanks. (Looks around quickly for an escape route)
ME: LIKE, WHERE DO YOU ALL LIVE? CAN I COME TO VISIT?
DAN: Umm, Northern California, around that area. (Mentally taking note of my physical description to i.d. me as potential suspect for crazy stalker incidents).
ME: I'M TOTALLY COMING TO YOUR NEXT GIG!
DAN: Great....

I'm sure I came across as a maladroit drunkard. So yeah, Kyle and I are going to see them again June 3rd at the Belly Up. I highly recommend you check out their music at www.alomusic.com. They're also playing tonight at the Temple Bar in Santa Monica for you L.A. peeps. If you go, tell Dan that Kyle and crazy Cheryl sent you. Yeah, that's not stalkerish sounding at all...

OH YEAH, I found out that Costco sells something just like the Magic Mic for only $200! I guess that ruins my plan to import Magic Mic's from the Philippines and start a Magic Mic store. Oh well, for everyone who wanted to get one, now you know where to go. I guess Kyle and I will be less popular too since we won't be the only ones with a Magic Mic pretty soon - hee hee.

Happy Cinco de Mayo everyone! Justin will be in town this weekend, so we should be doing more exciting things than our usual sit in front of the TV weekends.

Aw Yeah!

2006-04-30T18:13:00.000-07:00

The Lakers are back baby! I am so jealous that Jay got to go the Friday game AND the crazy one today. There is nothing better than an adrenaline filled Laker playoff game at the Staples Center, topped off with delicious delicious bacon wrapped hotdogs. Aahh, those bacon wrapped hotdogs bring back some great L.A. memories, most of them involving late night states of intoxication. My favorite being the night of my 28th birthday party at White Lotus, when Kyle was so tanked he bought 12 bacon wrapped hotdogs for 5 people. And we wonder why he has such high cholesterol.

No vocab word today, I just wanted to post about how happy I am that it looks like we'll get to see the Lakers advance another round in the playoffs. Woop de woop!

Weighing In

2006-04-28T14:15:00.000-07:00

obsequious - adj. too eager to obey or serve (a.k.a. KISSING ASS)

Ugh. My "loose jeans" totally feel tight on me. This after a week where I vowed to eat primarily fruits and veggies and I did my first form of exercise in months. Our office just started doing lunch time yoga classes in the backyard. We work out of a huge Victorian historic home so it's a pretty nice environment to do your warrior poses and downward dogs in (haha, that just sounded wrong).

Kyle doesn't understand why I stress about weight so much. Honestly, I know I'm pretty lucky in that I don't fluctuate too dramatically when it comes to weight. I just keep telling him, "You don't understand because you aren't a girl!" When I turned 30, it was like I stopped caring so much about what other people think about me, in all aspects except for weight. I know you ladies can relate to me, so to the guys reading this you'll have to either bear with me or I'll try to make it up to you another day by writing about the Lakers or something.

Don't you hate it when you see someone who you haven't seen in a while, and you get the feeling that she is analyzing you, trying to assess whether you've gained or lost weight? Maybe it's my paranoid mind working in overdrive, but I swear that there are some people I just dread running into because I know I'll get the old look up and down. I'm not just talking friends either, it happens with family members, co-workers, acquaintances, etc. I'm sure I've been guilty of it myself in the past, but knowing how it feels I have consciously reformed my ways. I still remember the time when I was at work in the lunch room at my last job, and I was reading an article in Cosmopolitan magazine about Oprah or something. One of the articles on the cover was something to the effect of "How to Lose 10 Lbs. in 10 Days", and one of my co-workers walked right up to me and said, "Oh, are you learning about how to lose extra weight? Here's what you should do..." and she proceeded to list different ways I could shave off my excess flabbinesss. Seriously, without me even saying one word about trying to do that! I was so devastated, and obviously still traumatized to this day. I do not try to lose weight because I'm trying to attract men - I'm a married woman! I do it so that I don't have to worry about other women criticizing my lifestyle.

So to all of you ladies out there, I'm not trying to be obsequious, but listen to Dove and know that we are beautiful in all shapes and forms. I've gotta try to start taking my own advice.

This does not by any means translate into me giving up the food I like in order to look like Nicole Richie. My love for chocolate and carbs far outweighs my self consciousness about what people think about my weight. :)

From Britney to Celine

2006-04-26T16:32:00.000-07:00

equanimity - n. calmness of temperament

I had a moment of enlightenment the other day - an epiphany if you will - that reminded me that I am no longer a spring chicken anymore. You see, it is common knowledge that I have always been a fan of pop music, dating back to the time I purchased my very first New Kids on the Block tape. Yes, I said TAPE - although they had graduated to CDs by the time "Step by Step" came around from what I remember. Needless to say, I've always been a listener of the Top 40 variety, until recently, when I realized that the DJs only ever talked about hooking up and dating problems. Things I totally do not relate to, seeing as how I've been with Kyle ever since I was practically wearing a training bra.

So, I decided to switch to a station that plays what's known in the media buying world as "Soft Adult Contemporary" music, meaning lots of slow songs from the 80's and 90's. To my delight, I discovered that they play all my favorite karaoke songs, from "Wind Beneath My Wings" to "Can You Feel the Love Tonight". Cheesey, I know. But now I get to sing to myself at the top of my lungs in the car and pretend that I am an undiscovered talent in the world of music. Christina Aguilera ain't got nothing on me! Another bonus of this station is that they broadcast the cheapest gas prices in San Diego twice every hour. Seeing as how I was raised by a father who maintains a mental catalogue of the gas stations with the lowest prices across the entire state of California, this is exciting news. Literally, my dad will tell you to drive 20 miles out of your way to fill up on a gas station priced 5 cents lower than the one down the street from your house (thus defeating the purpose of the lower gas price, but I think it's more a matter of principal with him). My dad does not show equanimity when it comes to talking gas. "What, you paid $3.12 for gas? TERRIBLE! The Arco on Winchester & Valley Parkway only charges $3.07. You should've gone there!"

Anyway, I was excited to share this new source of cheap gas information with my dad when I saw him the other day, only to discover that he was already tuned into the station in his car.

Me: "Oh dad, do you listen to this station because they tell you where the lowest gas prices are?"
Dad: "No, I just like the music!"

I officially have the same music taste as my parents. Next thing you know I'll be posting up at Pechanga and hitting up the buffets on a daily basis.

Bullseye

2006-04-25T08:45:00.002-07:00

ascetic: adj.; practicing self denial; stark

HAPPY 35TH ANNIVERSARY MOM & DAD! Here's to 35 more years of corny jokes and Scrabble tournaments.

Allow me to pay homage to one of my most favoritest places in the world. Yes ladies, I know you know what I'm talking about - it's the almighty TARGET! I used to get so excited every time I went that I would have to go to the bathroom as soon as I walked through the sliding glass doors. Just the sight of those glorious red shopping carts all lined up in a row had me running to the nearest ladies room. However, I quickly discovered the one major drawback of Target. That would be the not so clean bathrooms. So now I've trained myself to have some control so as not to mar the joyous occassion that is a trip to Target.

I was quite proud of myself for having ascetic restraint last night and only spending $25 there. I can probably count on one hand the number of times I've gone to Target and spent less than $50. They are so smart to put everything you could have ever wanted and more in one place. Remember when Mossimmo used to be an overpriced store in South Coast Plaza? Well, gone are the days when I could not even afford to purchase one Mossimmo sock. Now you can get a Mossimmo dress, jacket, and even a pair of sassy shoes to complete your outfit for less than the price of one of those said socks in days gone by.

The $1 section is insane yo! Who knew you could buy so many things for a mere 1/3rd of the cost of a gallon of gas? Lately I've been having this problem where I confuse my dishes sponges with my counter sponges, and I was thinking it would be great to get a couple of sponge dishes to distinguish the two. Well lo and behold, what do you think I found in the $1 section last night? Sponge dishes AND a pair of kitchen tongs that I have been in desperate need of. I must have been a good girl this year, because Santa Target just sent me some early Christmas presents!

If heaven were a place on Earth, I think it would have to be Disneyland with a Target planted firmly in the middle of Downtown Disney. But not one of those two story Targets, those are just too complicated for me. I like the idea of being able to wander the aisles without having to worry about which floor I need to hit up for my Herbal Essences shampoo. Ooh, or better yet, what if "It's a Small World" floated you right through the Target aisles at the end? They have taken to putting their Disney souveneir stores at the end of each ride so that poor parents like Cheryl and Chris have to practically blindfold their kids in order to avoid spending their life savings on princess figurines and such. I think Disney would love my idea - somebody get Robert Iger on the phone!

The Sky is Falling!

2006-04-24T14:49:00.000-07:00

gaucherie: n.; socially awkward; tactless behavior

What a bee-yoo-tiful day it is today! It's days like these when I really miss my little red VW convertible Cabriolet that I could drive around with the top down.

So Kyle has lately been obsessed with this psychic guy, Edgar Caycee. They did a History Show special on him the other day which I, of course, slept through (I am completely powerless against that recliner couch, I tell you), but Kyle stayed up and watched all the way until the show ended at 10:00.

Side Bar: There must be something in our marriage license saying that we can't stay up past 10:30, because ever since we got married I cannot for the life of me stay up beyond that time.

Anyway, back to the psychic. Apparantly he and multiple dudes with prophetic powers have predicted that the world is going to come to an end in the year 2012. This is all Kyle has been able to talk about. I for one, believe that ignorance is bliss, so I would have been happy to not know that information at all. But now that I do, I feel the need to share with all of you because for some reason, I feel much more comforted knowing that we will be harboring this knowledge of the end of the world together. I apologize if some of you view this as a form of gaucherie on my part, but darnit, it makes ME feel better!

My reality show options are slowly dwindling. First the end of Project Runway, now the Next Food Network Star is over. I was happy that Guy won because I voted for him. Kyle makes fun of me because yes, I do cast votes for shows such as American Idol, the Next Food Network Star, and you can bet I'm getting my dialing fingers ready for So You Think You Can Dance. Get out and vote y'all!

Such a Premium Dancer

2006-04-23T13:57:00.000-07:00

febrile - adj.; feverish

Have you seen that movie, "Everything is Illuminated"? My favorite quote: "All the ladies want to get carnal with me because I am such a premium dancer." That pretty much describes Kyle last night at Jen and Josh's wedding. There is something that comes over him whenever he gets near the dance floor at a wedding. His body suddenly takes over and he is thrown into a state of febrile gyrations as he transforms into a dancing fiend right before your very eyes. If any of you single folks ever invite him to your wedding in the future, tell the videographer to keep an eye out for Kyle and his mad skills.

The wedding was really beautiful, bride and groom were glowing with happiness. The cutest part was when Josh was repeating his vows after the minister, and one of the lines was "as we join together in our bond of everlasting love", Josh looked at Jen and said "evalasting looove". Such an adorable couple!

Love

2006-04-21T08:38:00.000-07:00

suppliant: adj. entreating, beseeching

Holla! Happy Friday everyone! The weather has been beautiful all week long and now today it's cloudy and yucky. I'm going to a Padres game tonight and an outdoor wedding tomorrow - hope the weather comes through for me, the Padres, and the bride (congrats Jen Lemoine!).

David e-mailed me from London and I got to thinking about all the fun things I miss about living there. One of the things I loved most was the way everyone greeted you with, "Hello, love!". I don't know why, it just made me feel happy inside. But you know if I tried to say it it would just sound lame. I don't have that cool British accent to back it up with. For some reason, British accents make things sound so much more cool and more intelligent. Also, they make for better acting. Kyle and I were watching the Chronic-WA-cles of Narnia, and a quarter of the way through the movie I turned to him and said, "Is it just me, or are these kids really bad actors?" You know they've gotta be really bad if it even shows through their British accents! Not that I think I could do any better, but come on - they must have auditioned a bazillion kids for those roles and those were the best they could find? Now those Harry Potter kids, they are good.

By the way, I'm loving the comments you guys are sending out so I implore you to heed my suppliant plea to keep 'em coming! That would have sounded really cool if I had a British accent, trust me.

Lookyloo

2006-04-20T15:36:00.000-07:00

quotidian: adj. daily, commonplace, customary

Do you ever look around when you're in your car and snoop at people when they don't think anyone else sees? I don't do it that often, but I see the funniest things when I do. Like last night, I was stopped at a light on the corner of Mira Mesa Blvd. and Camino Santa Fe, right next to an L.A. Fitness. For some reason, I felt the urge to look over into the big window where the aerobics room is. First of all, I am a firm believer in not working out in a gym where the whole world can see you. Windows in gym should be an illegal concept. Who wants to be subject to public viewing when you've got sticky hair and pit stains, and who is even interested in looking at that shizz? Well, apparantly I am because there I was spying on a group of Filipino moms and dads, looking like they were practicing the cha-cha. Probably for some kid's debut. Filipino parents live for that stuff man. I remember my debut, and it was more like my mom's coming out party then mine. All I wanted to do was bump some Boyz II Men, when my mom insisted on having her AND ALL HER FRIENDS out there doing the Kadal Blelah. At the time I was really embarrassed, but now that I think about it I should have appreciated the cultural aspect of it more.

So to whatever 18 year old Filipino young lady it is whose mom and dad are gathering their friends at the L.A. Fitness during all hours of the night to practice a dance for your party, I say rock with it. Just remember that your parents are embarrassing you because they love you.

I'm off to get my hair cut. Of course my hair looks like crap on a quotidian basis, and today when I'm about to get it cut I get a bunch of compliments on it, making me not want to cut it. Wish me luck!

Reality Check

2006-04-19T12:38:00.000-07:00

stentorian: adj. extremely loud

Anyone who knows me in the slightest is aware of what a reality show junkie I am. It all started with the Real World (thanks to Nina for the introduction) and just spiraled from there. So we must talk American Idol.

Kyle and I were mortified last night to hear Ace sing, of all things, our wedding song. Why oh why did he have to pick "That's All" out of all the thousands of songs he probably could have chosen?! Ugh, the guy is just too cheesey for me. Sure, he's good looking, but I'd take Taylor or Elliot over him any day. I am a huge Taylor fan. Even Kyle's admitted that he would be curious to hear his CD if he released one. That's the highest compliment Kyle would ever give an Idol contestant.

And how excited am I that "So You Think You Can Dance" is coming back? Love that show! I let out a stentorian cheer last night when the commercial came on during Idol. I am going to be in TV heaven in May. Nobody call me between the hours of 8-9p on Tuesdays or Thursdays. You've been warned.

Another thing I feel compelled to warn you about - do not try fat free vanilla yogurt. It's the grossest thing I've ever had, right up there with my polenta/kidney beans/spinach experiment. Ick.

Kevin + Bean = :p

2006-04-18T16:19:00.000-07:00

vagary: n. caprice; whim

One of the things I miss most about living in L.A. was being able to listen to Kevin & Bean in the morning. Even though L.A. morning traffic can be/is horrendous, having them along for the AM commute almost made me look forward to the drive (almost, but not quite). I just haven't been able to find any morning shows in San Diego that come close to the brilliance that is Kevin & Bean. Thanks to Joon-dawg, I have recently become privvy to a blog that streams K&B so on slow days at work I get to catch up on all the latest happenings in lala land.

The other day I was listening and Ralph casually mentions something about his wife. What?! Ralph has a wife?! I thought he was intent on being a lifelong bachelor. I felt like I had been stranded on a desert island somewhere, only to return and find that the world had turned upside down on it's head all while I was wasting away my days climbing trees and gathering coconuts. Now I know how Mike Seaver felt when he stayed home sick from school and discovered that Gilligan's Island reruns still aired even when he wasn't home to watch them.

By the way, did you notice that 3 out of my 5 last posts were all about food? I knew I had an obsessive relationship with food, but it's sort of hard to see it laid out in black and white for you.

I've decided on a vagary to get my hair cut this Thursday.

See, this is why I don't use advanced vocabulary words! They just don't sound right!

Chocolate & Coffee, Here I Come!

2006-04-17T13:10:00.000-07:00

I think I'm going to start a new thing where I post a new vocab word every day. I took the GRE not that long ago, and I still have stray notecards floating around my purse, my car, and all over the apartment. I'd say I've already forgotten about 75% of what I studied, so maybe I'm hoping that the information on those notecards will be transferred back to my brain somehow if I keep them around long enough. You know how Starbucks has all those flash cards around their store to promote that new movie, Akeelah & The Bee? I wish they had those when I was studying for the GRE because I spent most of my studying time at Starbucks.

Today's Vocab Word is: SUCCOR (no, not that kind of "sucker")
Meaning: verb; aid;assist; comfort

So boys and girls, let's try to use the word SUCCOR in context today. You can impress your friends, family, and people at work with your expansive knowledge of vocabulary words.

After giving up chocolate and coffee for Lent, my tastebuds are happy to welcome back the glorious return of delicious white chocolate mochas and Milano cookies. Oh how I've missed you chocolate and coffee. Easter was fun, just hung out with Mom and Dad and the rest of the family in Fallbrook. Our holidays always seem to consist of eating exorbitant amounts of food and sitting around the TV watching a Laker game. It's funny how the things I used to find embarrassing about my parents are now just so hilarious to me. I think I'm becoming more and more like them in my old age, hence the evolving appreciation for corny jokes. Here's a rundown of a few of the highlights from yesterday:

Dad: "Are you getting sleepy from the turkey? You must be taking a trip to Japan." (get it? trip to Japan = tryptophan)

Upon discussing past seasons of American Idol, Cathee says: "Is William Hung still..."
Mom: "Hung?"
Cathee & Cheryl: "MOM!!"
Kyle & Mike trying to hide their laughter behind mouthfuls of turkey.

Every time mom does something dad doesn't like he screams in a high-pitched voice, "Ay, MOMMY! What are you doing?" Then two seconds later they are cracking up about some other corny joke. Okay, it doesn't sound that funny, but it's funny when it happens every single time we see them, like clockwork.

Peace out everyone, hope this post helps to succor you through your work day.

Dim Sum and Then Some

2006-04-15T18:18:00.000-07:00

Kyle and I hit up our favorite San Diego dim sum restaurant, Jasmine, for some oh so delicious dumpling gloriousness. There's nothing better than the sight of steam rising from hot plates as they get carted around right to your table.

Except I have to say, a dim sum trip with me is not the most relaxing experience.

Half the time I spend with my neck craned out as far as it can go, searching for the lady with the best cart in order to flag her down before she gets accosted by some neighboring table that takes all of the best stuff so that by the time she gets to us our only option is chicken feet. Which is what happened to us today. All I wanted was a plate of gailan (Chinese broccoli). I was so excited to see a cart stacked with two rows of freshly steamed gailan as it came out of the kitchen, just one row down from us. I watched, mouth drooling, as the cart rolled down the first aisle, and with anticipation got ready to flag the waitress down as soon as she made her way over to us, when to my horror, she proceeded to skip our aisle and headed straight to the next. 15 minutes and five rejected dim sum carts later, she slowly rolled over to Kyle and I with one last plate ready for the taking when the family of 6 next to us pounced and took it from right under my nose! Finally she approached Kyle and I with her offering of chicken feet, and when I asked about more gailan coming out she snapped that it would be 10 more minutes until the next round was ready. Doh!

You see, in my estimation, there are five key plates that make a perfect dim sum trip:

1. Gailan - The one true healthy thing that provides a key balance of nutrition, not to mention tastes damn good.
2. Sui mai - The old stand by.
3. Har gow - See #2.
4. BBQ Pork Bao - No other bao will do!
5. Custard tarts - The piece d' resistance to round out the meal. If you've never had this creamy custard combined with crispy tart crust, you do not know what you're missing. Seriously!

Can you tell I'm a little fanatic about my food? It's weird, I think I've always been extremely particular about having just the right combination of flavors with every meal. Maybe dim sum style eating isn't for me, since I can never get all of the above five dishes at the exact time I need them. But that doesn't mean I'm going to give it up, I love it too much to do that. I have a master plan. Next time I'm going to have the waitress seat us right next to the kitchen so I get to be the person that steals all the best stuff while the poor saps in the next aisle look on with envy.

Mwwahahahaha. My plan to take over dim sum restaurants is slowly but surely unfolding before your very eyes.

How does being a dim sum waitress work anyway? Do they get a commission for every plate they sell? Because they sure are pushy with those things sometimes. No ma'am, I do not want that plate of turnip cake, thank you. If they do work for commission, do you have to start at the chicken feet and work your way up? I always feel guilty when I say no to somebody's dim sum cart, like I just turned them down for a date or something.

You don't have to say anything, I know I'm overthinking this whole thing.

Jewel

2006-04-14T12:55:00.000-07:00

Just got back from a station event where I got to see Jewel perform. And I have to say - WOW! She sounds even better in person than she does on the radio! I used to know this guy in college who claimed to know Jewel when she was still living out of her van in San Diego. According to him, she got really full of herself once she hit it big.

All I can say is, if I could sing like that I just might be one cocky bitch myself.

Somebody I was with took pictures, so I'll try to post those if I ever figure out how.

Happy Easter everyone!

Tapatio makes everything better

2006-04-13T08:40:00.000-07:00

Last night I made the worst meal ever. And that's saying a lot considering that Kyle and I eat pretty much everything. I was trying to be healthy, but this meal just added to my negative perception that healthy = so not delicious. Picture a kidney bean, spinach, and polenta concoction. What the heck is polenta anyway? I think it's some weird corn meal concoction. I still remember the first time I ever had polenta. It was in college, when I went on a San Francisco trip with David, Kathy, and Daphne. We were at some shi-shi restaurant (Started with a Z - Za Zou?), I think in the Castro District. The snotty waiter so did not want to be serving a bunch of fresh faced teenage kids. I think I was the one who asked what polenta was, and with a look of disdain he explained the concept of polenta to me.

Flash forward back to last night's polenta surprise meal. After a few gross mouthfuls of the grainy mush, Kyle and I were desperate to find something to make it taste close to good. So we added Tapatio. It really does improve the taste of anything in my opinion. I decided to make a quesadilla, and in the interest of saving food I proceeded to fill it with the polenta, spinach, and kidney bean craziness.

How gross am I?! Thank you Tapatio!

Taking the Plunge!

2006-04-12T18:28:00.000-07:00

So this blog thing...

First of all, I have to thank Jay and Cicely for inspiring me to start this (they have the funniest blogs, you should check them out). For the past few days I've been like a freakin' crack addict reading blogs all day long (in my spare time I mean, as I would never think to do such a thing during work hours). I've been thinking about starting a blog for the longest time. When I was a kid, I used to keep a journal..religiously. Then when I hit high school it became much more sporadic, and once college hit the only time I really kept any record of my life was when I traveled. Um, do I know where those journals are now? Not really.

So now I'm just going to lay all my thoughts online for the world to see for all of eternity. Or maybe just my 10 friends to see for as long as they find it interesting - two weeks, a month tops. In any case, I think the main thing that's been holding me back is this paranoia I have that someone someday is going to read something I write here and use it against me. Yeah, that's the sick way my mind works! Like one day I'm going to walk into work and they're going to say, "I'm sorry Cheryl, you're fired because we read on your blog entry on 4/12/06 that you have been wasting time at work looking up random blogs." Because we all know that nobody ever surfs the internet at work. By the way, is there some new term for "surfing the internet" that I should know about? Because that just seems like a pretty antiquated term, and I feel like I'm pretty much out of it when it comes to the latest slang. I still think "the bomb" is cool to say.

I had the hardest time coming up with a title to this blog. I think "I'm laughing at myself" is a pretty appropriate one. I try really hard most of the time to not think about myself - not to make it sound like I think I'm the most selfless person in the world, it's just that I'm pretty much uncomfortable with thinking or talking about me, and thus not too introspective. I guess it's pretty ironic that I started a blog. But I digress. I would say 75% of the time when I do think about myself, it's to laugh at something I did, thought, or said. Today it would be when I took a trip down to the shady 7-11 down the street from my work just to get a straw and then felt obligated to buy some candy in order to get it for free. I stood there and stared at those damn slurpee straws for a good five minutes, debating whether or not I should just try to take one and run. Finally I decided to do the honorable thing and I grabbed a pack of Twizzlers (to be used as whiskers for an Easter Bunny cake I'm planning to make). By the time I got to the cash register, a nice line had formed and more people were filing up behind me. My mind started racing - would I hold up the line with my request for a free straw, thus inciting a riot with Corn Nuts and Ciabatta sandwiches being thrown around? Palms sweating, I approached the cashier, held out the straw and said, "I just need this straw - and I'm buying Twizzlers too, is it okay?". She took one look at me and the hardcore thug standing behind me, gave me a smirk and said, "Well yeah, that's easy."

Crisis avoided.